It's a beautiful night for a PR

This is what was running through my mind as I laced up my spikes and strided out on the football field at St. Mary's Minnesota. All of the ridiculous nerves I had last week at Platteville were replaced by complete calm. I wanted to run a good race, but at the same time, I knew I could do it. I wasn't expecting anything, and I knew in the ridiculous field that worrying about place wouldn't even be an option, so I just felt confident that I could run my race, and that's what I was going to do. The night air was cool, calm, and there was an electricity to running under the lights that just got me pumped up. "It's a beautiful night to run fast."

But first, the ridiculousness that came before...
We left the Union at 11:30, one of 4 cars that were making the 3 hour trek to Winona. I actually wasn't thinking about the race much at all on the way there, and I was glad I brought a book (The Kite Runner, which I've been planning on reading forever and am just now finally getting around to) because it was a looooong drive. We got to the track about 15 minutes after the meet was supposed to start...and it hadn't. We heard that they were starting late...then there was another announcement that they "would know in 10-20 minutes when the meet would be starting". As it turned out, the starter wasn't there. He was in Lacrosse. I really don't know how that works, since pretty much the ONE thing you need to have a track meet is a starter with a gun...but keep in mind that this is the first track meet this school has ever held, on their brand new track. Which was gorgeous, by the way...I love the bluffs along the Mississippi.


I took some pictures since I had nothing better to do while sitting around in the sun...it was like 75...HOT! I remember being yelled at by Fischer to get under the bleachers and out of the sun in high school...and that's when I was running the 100 hurdles. I feel like the sun sapping your energy is more of a problem when you're running a 5K. Ohh well. The meet eventually got underway (an hour late), and soon it was time to watch the men's steeplechase. A couple WTC guys were running this without having so much as run over a hurdle before...and the results were entertaining...to say the least...

Awesome? Yes. And he didn't even end up getting last! So the meet went on. Some more super sweet WTC PRs, especially from Jade who ran a 4:53 in the 1500...holy SHIT she's fast! I was trying really hard to stay hydrated, since that always seems to be a problem for me at meets, and especially in the heat. Brittany and I spent a lot of time refilling our water bottles in the SMU "Student Center"...which looked more like a crappy hotel lobby. They also had a bizzare display focused on their bubbler being a member of the SMU Athletics Hall of Fame, which Brittany and I thought was absolutely hilarious. There were also some absurd last names of people, the highlight of which was a couple of guys in the 100 with the last names "Yerhot" and "Wockenfus"...except it sounded like "Rockinpuss". Somehow this escalated into a bunch of us deciding that a great name for a movie (porn?) would be Yerhot Rockinpuss & the Bubbler of Glory. Yeah, don't ask me. Track meets make us act like we're on crack...its science.

So fast forward a few hours of ridiculousness to ~an hour before race time. Annnnd now is when I start getting nervous. Brittany and I went out on a warmup and my legs just felt crappy, I felt kind of dizzy (which I'm starting to realize might be a nervous thing, since I think its happened to me before every race this season). Then of course, I had to pee (apologies for the TMI, but this is definitely a major nervous problem of mine)...and OF COURSE, there was no toilet paper. Standard luck. Speaking of bad luck, the next thing that happened was sad but kind of hilarious. So last week at Platteville, they didn't have hip numbers above 19, so I had to wear 2 2's for 22...not only were they shitty hip numbers to begin with, but when you have 6 inches of sticker on your hip things just get crazy. So I was all excited as I walked up to the check in table because I saw that they actually had numbers for the 20s! I said something about it and explained to the lady about the week before. Well as it turns out, they did indeed have numbers in the 20s...
except 22.
Which of course, happened to be my number.

I was laughing so hard - I mean seriously, how does that even happen? They at least ripped the 2s off of some 29s so the numbers were a little smaller, but it was seriously hilarious.

I think that's what finally ended my nervousness. As I started doing strides I realized, hey, my legs feel kind of GOOD! The weather was perfect, we were under the lights, and that's when I started thinking - It's a beautiful night for a PR.

We got on the line, the ref was being an idiot and thought it was the 3K (seriously, who WAS this guy?), a LaX girl made some comment about how he was an hour late and then....bang. We were off.

The first mile went by pretty fast - I was actually kind of hanging on to the back of the pack, and one girl was even behind me. Annnd then we hit the mile. At 6:05. Shit. I know I said I wanted to go out fast but...that's not what I meant. But what's done is done, and I had no choice but to keep going. The stupidity of that first mile hit me about halfway through the second. All of a sudden I simultaneously got a side stitch (again!! why??) and felt my legs start seizing up. Oh. No. This is not happening. The entire second mile was really unpleasant. The one girl from wherever (St Mary's maybe?) I had been in front of passed me, and I was noooot feeling good. I came through the 2-mile in 12:40. 6:35 for the second mile = FAIL. I was concerned about that, but I tried to focus - my plan was that if I could get through the 2 mile in under 12:45, I could break 20. So I bore down. I heard Dallas yelling at me that I had to run a 6:30 mile to break 20. Wait a second...that means I have to SPEED UP? That's when I started getting concerned. But I knew that if I didn't get this because I was a moron and had to follow the crowd and go out in 6:05, I was going to be so incredibly pissed. And that I just had to do it - for everything. For all of the hard work that I've put in since January, because I knew I could, and because this dream that seemed absolutely impossible at the beginning of the season was on the verge of happening. 800 to go. It was starting to get bad now...my legs were tying up, and I started feeling like I was going to puke...and yet I continued to try to speed up. I was running completely by myself now - and in a way, I feel like that's how running should be sometimes, just you out there, fighting yourself as your only competitor. I looked at my watch with 400 to go, and I don't honestly remember what it said, but in that moment I knew, just knew, that I had it. I pulled out one of the best kicks of my life, speeding up and then absolutely pulling the trigger with 200 to go. I sprinted out every ounce of life in me...and then I hit the finish, slamming my stopwatch. I looked down and saw the beautiful, beautiful numbers:
19:53.69.
[official time 19:54.62...but who's counting]

The point is, it started with a 19.

So yes, I dropped 24 seconds from last week. And silenced my own doubts that there was no way I would ever be good enough to run under a 20 minute 5K. As I said - I know that this is by no means a fantastic time compared to everyone else running the 5K in D3. And most likely, I'd be placing higher if I was running the steeplechase. But at this point, I don't care. I think I have accomplished more this track season than I ever have, running-wise. I picked a goal that I basically figured was impossible, somehow realized that it was actually a possibility, and I did it. I have one more 5K to race on Saturday, but regardless of how that goes, the season is a success. But while we're at it, I might as well try to drop some more time....

On a less exciting note, I had a really hard time with tonight's workout. It was most likely the combination of 8.5 hungover miles @ 7:15 pace yesterday [note: I'm an idiot] + dance performance last night + work @ 6 am this morning + legs all of a sudden remembering that, oh yeah, I PRed by 24 seconds on Friday = suckfest. The workout was 5 x 1000 @ 5K goal pace (which is now a complete mystery to me, since I never even considered goal times under 20:00, but apparently has now been upgraded to somewhere in the 19:40-19:30 range).
1: 3:52 (19:20 pace)
2: 3:59 (19:55 pace)
3: 4:01 (20:05 pace)
4: 3:58 (19:50 pace)
5: 3:52 (19:20 pace)
I can't decide whether to call it a win, fail, or draw. My legs felt like shit, and I wanted to throw up on the last 2, but then again, my last 2 were also faster and I somehow pulled a fast one out at the end. The 3rd one was the worst - it was one of those deals where I start thinking about how crappy I feel and how slow I'm going, wonder why I can't go faster, and it makes me freak out, hyperventilate, and thus feel shittier. But anyway, all things considered, I guess it went OK.

I'm just going to stop rambling now because this has gone on forever...but yeah, running. Running is sweet.

Still in disbelief

Last night, at the Phil Esten Challenge at St. Mary's in Winona, MN, I ran a 19:53 5K. It was a 25 second PR, and I still am in complete and utter disbelief that I did it. I realize that just breaking 20, in the grand scheme of college 5K running, is not that spectacular, but to me it is a milestone that I never, ever, in a million years, believed I would be able to achieve. But I did it. I did exactly what I wanted to do: get out fast (although, I have to admit, I went out like 10 seconds faster than planned), get through the 2-mile in under 12:40, and then I managed to pick it up on the 3rd mile, which has NEVER happened in my life. My splits are ugly, but they work: 6:05, 6:35, 6:28.

A more complete race report is coming, because the entire experience of the meet itself was just ridiculous and hilarious, but I just needed to put this up because I am so, so happy. And so proud of myself for not giving in, and just DOING it. And even though this was supposedly my "goal" for the season, I honstly never believed it would happen. But I guess, during that race, some part of me knew it could. And I did it. :)

Flashback: Tosafest Run For ALS 2003

Since there are so many moments in my running career that happened way before this blog, I think once in awhile I'm going to take some time and create some mini race reports based on things I remember or things I wrote down at the time. Somewhere I wrote an entry on diaryland or something about this race, but unfortunately that's long gone - but I think especially in light of my newfound love for the 5K, this race deserves special mention. Why? Because it was my first 5K, first road race, and first distance race EVER.

I really wish I could remember what exactly possessed me to do this race, but in all honesty I have no idea. It sounded fun? You got a t-shirt? I seriously don't know, but somehow I found myself on the starting line that warm September day. I surprisingly didn't make the faux pas of wearing my race t-shirt during the race - I vividly remember giving it to my mom after I picked up my packet. I also recall being involved in an extremely awkward conversation with my [creeptastic] 8th grade history teacher who also happened to be the middle school cross country coach, asking me when I decided to take up running. Truth was, I hadn't. I was a junior in high school, still a year out from even thinking about running any sort of distance, and I guess I was just there to have a good time. I remember my goal was to run it in under 30 minutes...gotta love that now my goal is to run a 5K under 20. How times change...

The thing that I remember impressed me the most was just the atmosphere, and its something that I still love to this day. The camaradrie and way that everyone involved, no matter how fast or slow, supported eachother and just the excitement of lining up with hundreds of other people. [Side note: that's my one major reason I love cross country over track]. The race itself...I mean...what do you really say about running a 5K on no training? It was hard. It hurt. I got passed a lot. I actually took a water cup at the 2 mile water stop [yes, it was hot out...but in a 5K? I was such a newbie.] I thought about walking but I didn't. The same feelings I get sometimes now when I race...except at a much slower pace. The course was basically an out and back on a parkway, and on the way back it dipped down under a bridge to the finish. I had been running a little ways behind this girl for awhile, and as we went down this hill I vividly remember "You're a spinter! She looks like she could be in your age group, and you could pass her! Sprint!" So I sprinted, and I did indeed pass her. I finished the race in 28:26, a 9:09 mile pace. The funniest part of it? The girl WAS in my age group. And I beat her by 3 seconds...to WIN MY AGE GROUP. Let's think about this for a second - I haven't won my age group in a 5K since. But yet, with a 28:26, I won the 15-19 female AG that day. I have the paperweight to prove it (its actually pretty sweet). Moral of the story: run races when everyone who's on the high school cross country team can't. :P

I told this story to some people in the club a couple weeks ago and they thought it was hilarious! I think people who have only met me in the past couple years just assume that I've always been as much of a distance runner as I am now. But I think it makes me even more proud of my accomplishments to know that I wasn't - that once upon a time, I wrote a story called "The Mile Of Horrors", that I once ran the 5K in 28:26. And now here I am shooting for a sub-20 5K and running 50 miles a week. I guess the point is that I had noooo idea what I was beginning when I signed up for that race 6 years ago. And also that I just like to reminisce and ramble. Anyway...I still wear the shirt all the time. It's the most ridiculous shade of yellow ever and has a really awkward running person on it, but I love it all the same.

So another 5K on the track tomorrow at St Mary's...which I'm going to keep calling LaX because that's where its supposed to be. It's supposed to be like 75 out which is INSANE, and while I'd say my optimal running temp is more like 60, its still going to be a great day to PR. I will have no one to run with, seeing as the next person seeded in front of me is seeded at 19:37, but you know, I know what splits I want to run. I don't need other people to run them for me. I just need to go out, run my race, and kick some ass.

6:15. 6:29. 6:30.
I can do this.

"Hey, at least we don't have to do an Ironman"

Well, I still seem to be working in the PR department.

20:18.45 at Platteville on Friday. And maybe this means I'm finally doing it right, but this was no cruise around like the last 2 races have been. It. Was. HARD. And yet, it wasn't so hard that I don't think I can run 19 seconds faster sometime in the next 3 weeks.

It was a looooong day...we left at 2, got to Platteville around 3:30, and the meet started at 4. Watching one of my teammates race the steeplechase for the first time with a raging hangover was pretty entertaining (he gave up getting drunk for Lent, and it was Good Friday...so he HAD to get drunk on Thursday night, apparently), and watching the SP chick who tripped me at Carthage go completely under in the steeple pit didn't exactly make me sad either...does that make me a bad person? ;) Anyway, the rest of the meet leading up to my race wasn't too eventful. All of my insane nerves that had built up the past week I think had just kind of reached critical mass and gone away, because I wasn't really feeling nervous, I was actually just feeling kind of crappy. My legs felt sluggish and I was cold and I just wanted to get the damn thing over with already. We had quite the crew warming up - the 4 of us WTC girls and a couple girls from Wisconsin who were also at the meet. It's cool that some of the girls on the team are really nice people and actually give us credit for doing what we do. Then it just seemed like we were waiting foreverrrr...putting on spikes, doing strides, hopping around, saying ridiculous things (I had a dream on Thursday night that I was doing an Ironman, and Brittany and I decided that while the 5K would probably suck, it wouldn't be as hard as an Ironman. Which is a good thing...haha). Finally - time for the start. Under the lights...I haven't run a real race that way since high school....

WTC vs WTF...the faceoff

From the moment the gun went off I just didn't feel right - the whole first mile my legs felt crappy, and I just felt panicked - like I was running at some ridiculous pace I couldn't possibly hold, or I was pushing with all the effort I had and it just wasn't fast enough. And that's not a good feeling to have when you're in the first mile of a 3 mile race. I came through the mile at 6:20, with Brittany right behind me - I had loooong lost sight of Jade and Claire (so much for staying with Jade...). After the mile mark I finally started to relax a little bit, or at least I managed to get my mind working enough that I could tell myself to relax. I was running behind Wartburg girl #1 for the whole second mile...I finally decided to put in a surge past her, and about 200 meters later she sprinted past me. Damn. Although I was mad to have wasted the energy on the surge, I fell back into rhythm and by this point was finally getting into it. I came through the 2 mile at 12:56, 5 seconds faster than last week, and I just told myself to hang on.

The 3rd mile of the 5K is when I just stop thinking...the 2 mile split is really the last split I think about, and after that its just autopilot. I had Wartburg girls #2 and 3 behind me for awhile, and then they passed me with about 800 to go. I decided to start picking it up a little bit with 600 to go, a little more with 400 to go, and absolutely kicked it in with 200 to go, and I tried and tried and sprinted my life out but I could NOT get past those 2 damn girls...I was a little cranky about that. Other than the finish I just have random flashes of things happening throughout the race - Dallas screaming ridiculous, yet really helpful things on the curve leading into the home stretch, some kid playing random notes on a kazoo on the other curve where it was dark and otherwise quiet, an Oshkosh girl with glitter in her hair for some reason (really, this is a track meet, not a pom competition), my number flying off about 3 laps in and most likely hitting someone in the face (these hip numbers were really crappy, and since I was 22, a number which doesn't exist, I had 4 separate 2's plastered to my body, 2 on my leg and 2 on my chest. Ridiculous.) It was cool running under the lights, and I was really happy about PRing again, especially since I had just felt so...not good going into the race, and even throughout the first half of it.



By far the best thing that happened at the meet was during the 2nd heat of the guys 5K. They're lining up, and all of a sudden all of our guys are going "where the hell is Zais?" Well, as it turned out, he thought the start was on the OTHER SIDE of the field...so the gun is going off and he's sprinting across the infield (where the javelin is going on, by the way) throwing off his sweats. He got to the start about 10 seconds after the gun and proceeded to run his first lap in 68, catching the field 300 meters in. He went on to run a 15:46, complete with an utterly INSANE kick where he passed some 6 guys in the last 200 meters. Did I mention the guy is insane? So it was pretty fantastic haha. We also didn't make it home from the meet until 1:30 am...and then I got up and ran 12.5 miles with Brittany at 9 am on Saturday. We mileage whores are a special breed.

So what now? Well, this week is another Friday meet, technically hosted by LaX but actually being run at St. Mary's in Winona, MN. After this race, I really believe I can break 20...actually I'm going to stop saying that because "break" numbers and me tend to not get along. So I'm going to break 19:59. :) I have a plan - go out just a little faster, slow down the same amount (or less would be fine too, but I mean, I'm giving myself some leeway here.) My splits this past week were something like 6:20, 6:36, 6:38...to get my goal, I want to run 6:17, 6:28, 6:30...then close in less than 45, which I assume I could do. 3 seconds faster first mile, 8 seconds 2nd and 3rd...I guess it would be possible to throw some of that time onto the first mile too, but then we're getting down closer to what I would actually race a mile in at this point. This is me thinking out loud and babbling it out on my blog...its probably a good thing no one really reads this.

Anyway...bottom line: I think I can do this.

Today's workout was pretty hard - 6 x 800 @ 3:07-3:13 (5K goal pace) w/ 1:30 recovery jog. But I didn't fall apart (direct quote from my coach: "I thought you guys were going to fall apart, but you didn't!") and there it is - I ran the distance under the pace I want to run. Now take away 7:30 of rest, and we're in business. :)

Under pressure

Back in high school, especially senior year, I used to get ridiculously nervous before races. My nerves actually caused me to run badly on more than one occasion (case in point: sectionals), or I would run crappily in prelims, barely make it to finals, and then calm down enough to run well because I'd already run a race. Obviously nerves ruining your race can be a big issue in the 100 hurdles, when one screwy step out of the blocks can spell complete disaster. In high school I wanted to be good, I wanted to be the best, I wanted to WIN and I knew I was capable of it, and every race I felt like I had to prove myself. I remember spending study hall every day with my friend Jeff looking up meet results while he looked up stats from his tennis opponents...that and playing texttwist...and we both constantly gave eachother crap about how obsessed we were with our respective sports. In high school I didn't drink, didn't party, didn't really do much besides my sports/activities, and in the sprint, track was IT - all that mattered. School was a joke, dance kind of fell by the wayside, and it was all track, all the time. And so running well was all that mattered.

When I got to college, all of that kind of disappeared for awhile. I was so ecstatic just to be racing that I couldn't have cared less what times I was running. When I eventually switched over from hurdles to distance, my nerves were related more to the fact that I knew the race was going to hurt like hell than actually worrying about running well in it - sure, I wasn't thrilled when I had a bad race, but I didn't really expect to have a great one either. And that's pretty much how its been the past couple years - going into races nervous about the pain, and most of the time coming out with a result I'm moderately happy with.

PRing on Saturday has, apparently, changed all that.

I am 100% FREAKING OUT about my race tomorrow. I honestly haven't felt this way since high school - that sense of nerves and wanting so badly to run well and not knowing whether its possible. I've been checking the heat sheets obsessively, hunting down past races for my competitors, trying to figure out what I should take the first mile out in...it's ridiculous. And the fact that I feel this way about the 5K...well, that's just insane. Yet when I take 2 seconds to stop geeking out about the race itself and try to figure out why exactly I'm so damn nervous about it all of a sudden, its not actually too hard to explain why.

#1 - I have come to terms with the fact that yes, I am, and will be forever, a distance runner.
For the longest time I think I've thought of myself as "hurdler turned distance runner". Distance was like this weird thing that I just kind of did, and hey, if I could be OK at it, that was cool, because I was sick of getting worse at my 'real' events. If I did bad, it was easy enough to just be like "oh, well I'm not really a distance runner anyway". Yeah, that works when you're running the 800. Maybe even the mile. But choosing to run an effing 5K on the track? I can no longer try to tell myself that I'm "not really a distance runner". Because...I am. You don't do that if you're not a distance runner. And I think I've been denying that for awhile, and all of a sudden it's hit me that I am no longer, in any way, a sprinter...I'm all distance, all the way. And I think I'm still kind of in awe of myself for that.

#2 - I'm not used to PRing in the middle of the season. Or the beginning, for that matter.
Part of my deal in college has been switching events when I start to slow down at one. I haven't run the same "main" event 2 years in a row, which in a way is probably stupid but let's not worry about that for now. And in all of these (and cross country too) I PRed in my last or second-last meet of the season. It made sense - I went a little backwards from the end of the year before at the beginning of the season, got better throughout, PRed in a race after the whole season of training, and then it was like "ok, sweet season, peace out." I spent the whole time trying to get back to where I was the year before, and then get slightly better. But now, I PRed in the second damn race of outdoor. I still have 4 more meets to live up to, or hopefully improve upon, that. And that's what scares me - because my times are starting to get sort of legit, and because I actually dropped a TON of time just to start things...I want and need to be able to keep that up. And I think that's a BIG factor in my nerves.

#3 - I didn't start running this race just because I sucked at a different one, and I genuinely love running it.
I totally could be running the steeplechase right now. Maybe even should be. And I never thought that going up to the 5K instead of down to the 1500 would be the best decision I could make this season. I kept switching events because I didn't like getting worse/not improving, or that I wasn't really good at them to begin with, but I switched events this time because I want to and I genuinely think I can be not just mediocre, but at least "good".

So yeah? Pressure much? So anyway. I'm nervous for my race tomorrow. I'm nervous because there are a lot of really good girls in the race, I'm nervous because I don't want to run slower than last week, I'm nervous because Jade is in the race, I'm nervous, nervous, nervous. But I guess the good thing is, in a 5K, nerves can only help you. I'm not going to trip out of the blocks, if anything, I run my first mile 5 seconds fast. Which, if I want to drop time, is probably a good thing anyway. :)

carpe diem. the time is now.

Breaking the curse - Oshkosh Invite race report

Up until Saturday, I seriously thought it was impossible for me to run well on the track at UW-Oshkosh. It's a gorgeous track, just built my freshman year, but for some reason, I've had crappy luck with my races there. From hurdles to the 1500, it just never has quite worked out. So I'm happy to say that after 4 years of trying, I have finally broken the Oshkosh Curse and run a freaking awesome race at the Oshkosh Invite.

The day honestly didn't really start out that well. I was feeling kind of tired and out of it despite getting a ton of sleep the night before - not having to leave until 10 (an absolutely luxurious time compared to the usual 7 or 7:30) was pretty awesome. When we got to the stadium, the weather was pretty much the best I've ever seen it for this meet - relatively warm (like 50), sunny, and not absurdly windy. It was definitely breezy, but nothing like the ridiculous windstorm we had to deal with last year.

I was definitely really nervous the entire day - probably partially because I always seem to run like crap at this meet, partially because after looking at the heat sheets I was afraid that I was going to just about get last. My legs felt like bricks on the warmup and then my stomach started tossing and turning as I was doing strides - I seriously felt like I was going to puke. Not exactly the most ideal feeling to have going into an over 3 mile race...yeeeeah. But much as I always want to stop time in the middle of the 200 heats and just postpone actually doing the race forever, it doesn't work that way, and soon we were on the line, 29 girls in the 5K (what a HUGE heat). The gun goes, we go.

The first lap or two of the 5K I never really know what the hell is going on or think about much...just kind of getting over the initial adrenaline surge and get into a pace. I went out in 45 for the first 200 which seems to be pretty standard. The first couple laps I kept telling myself to not worry about the leaders, since there were girls in the race who run 17 minute 5Ks...this was not the time or place to do something stupid. I focused in, but it was tough to get into a rhythm the first few laps because there were a surprising (to me anyway) number of girls right around my pace. I got stuck behind a pack for about half a lap, got irritated with running on their heels as I always do, and put in a little surge to pass them, then focused on the next pack, which I soon was directly behind agan. I passed them but this time it was a little tougher to pick up the pace enough to get passed, and I think I got passed back by a couple of those girls later on. But anyway. I came through the mile in 6:20, which was right where I wanted to be - I knew that I went out too slow (never thought I'd say that!) last week and that I was going to slow down regardless, so I could pick up a lot of time by pushing it a little the first mile. Once I semi-passed that second group, the people I couldn't pass started pulling away from me, but I pulled away from the girls behind me (some Kim girl from St. Norbert...at least that's who I heard people cheering for vaguely behind me). There were WTC people scattered all around the track cheering, the most ridiculous of which was Dallas who alternated between yelling "here we go Audrey, here we go (clap clap)" and yelling my splits in the second half, which I was pleased to hear were 2 seconds or so per lap faster than last week.

I hit the 2-mile in 13:01 to my shock and awe - that is by far the fastest I've ever opened a 5K. And it was in the instant that I heard that time that I pretty much just thought to myself - "fuck it, I am PRing today!" So the entire second mile, I've been slooooowly reeling in this Northern Michigan girl. At first she seemed way too far for me to get her, but I guess by some combination of her dying and me not, all of a sudden I was right on her shoulder. I know you're not supposed to pass on the curve, but I didn't feel like sitting behind her any longer - I surged and passed her, of course sealing my fate for spending the rest of the race listening to "Go Jess! You can catch this girl!" Um, no, sorry Jess. You actually can't. I was still feeling really strong (seriously, who AM I?) and kept pushing. At some point with like 1200 to go, all of a sudden Dallas was on the other side of the track screaming "now's the time to put in some EFFORT!" I almost started laughing...yes, because I'm not trying at all right now...haha. Anyway, the last 1200 I never really think too much. It just kind of happens...I'm running, running, thinking I've put some distance on Jess and hoping she doesn't appear out of nowhere...running...running...just willing my legs to keep going onward. I looked at my watch for the first time all race with 400 to go and saw 18:58. And with that, I knew it - if I could just make it through this last 400 meters in some sort of slightly reasonable time, a PR would be mine. I kicked. The last lap seems to drag on forever, and then I'm in the final stretch...I cross the finish line, slam my watch (of course, there's no clock anywhere in the vicinity) and look down in anticipation.
20:27.

Despite gasping for breath and feeling like I'm about to fall over, I'm pretty sure I just yelled "YES!!!"

So I was giddy for the rest of the day. Still am, actually. We watched the men's 5k, the 4 x 4, and the 10K, which included a dude projectile vomiting as he sprinted down the home stretch, and the guy pacing him being like "it's ok dude, don't worry about it, just keep going". At least it was the home straight...how would you like to run even a 400 with puke all over your face? Classy.

So sub-20:30 5K = accomplished.
Suddenly, my goal of sub 20:00 doesn't seem so absurd. If I keep dropping time like this...I'm already thinking about what splits I need to run to get at least sub 20:15. I am such a loser, and I care not one bit.

Oh, and here's the song I had in my head for the entire first mile of the race:

Watch Nom Nom Nom Song on CollegeHumor

Ummm....sometimes I don't even know.

I am in love with the 5000 meter run

Results from the Oshkosh Invite:

Women 5000 Meter Run
================================================================================
Name                    Year School                  Seed     Finals  Points
================================================================================
1 Mitchell, Ayla     Uw-Oshkosh                     17:02.36    10
2 O'Grady, Megan     Uw-Eau Clair        17:25.00   17:28.83     6
4 Southworth, Jenna  Winona State        18:40.00   18:20.37     5
5 Smith, Steph       Winona State        19:20.00   18:26.04     4
6 Kangas, Laura      Michigan Tec        19:25.35   19:33.18     3
7 Rein, Lauren       Carroll Coll        19:30.00   19:35.35     2
8 Coughlin, Teresa   Uw-Eau Clair        20:00.00   19:38.06     1
9 Harris, Michaela   Northern Mic                   19:59.56
10 Beggs, Erin       Ripon               19:48.00   20:01.30
11 Heintz, Christy   Edgewood Col        20:04.00   20:09.37
12 Smith, Jill       Michigan Tec        19:49.87   20:13.22
13 Weichbrod, Nikki  Ripon               20:11.00   20:25.42
14 Zaferos, Audrey   Wisconsin Tr        21:04.00   20:27.72 
15 Krob, Jessica     Northern Mic        19:32.00   20:30.78
16 Hoklas, Kirsten   Northern Mic                   20:32.27
17 Bougher, Nicole   Northern Mic                   20:40.73
18 Keil, Kim         St. Norbert                    20:41.07
19 Bruestle, Sydney  Michigan Tec        19:28.47   20:43.83
20 Farrell, Brittany Wisconsin Tr        21:15.00   20:46.52
21 Hoklas, Megan     Northern Mic                   20:53.72
22 Baugher, StephanieNorthern Mic                   21:09.19
23 Kettula, Tasha    Northern Mic                   21:31.36
24 Considine, Ana    Wisconsin Tr        21:00.00   21:34.42
25 Rieber, Kelly     Winona State        20:50.00   21:55.31

Do you see my seed time? And do you see the time I actually ran?
MONSTER PR!!!!!
More complete race report coming later.  For now, suffice it to say that
 I am unbelievably happy with how I raced, and my long-term,
epic goal of breaking 20 no longer seems like an impossible dream...

211.7

That's how many miles I've run in the month of March (I know this a day before the end of the month because tomorrow is my day off :)) This is my highest mileage I have ever run in a month in my entire life. The week that included the first of the month was 45.1 miles (I suppose it didn't hurt that the day of that week that fell into March was my long run day), followed by 2 back to back weeks of 49.6, a week of 48, and a week of 45, plus 9.4 miles to start off the week today. Compare this to March of last year, when I ran 23, 28.3, 22, 30.9. Annnd I wonder why I'm so much stronger this year. I know some people can run really well off a lot less mileage, but I don't think I'm one of them. Lots of quality mileage this month too, and with only one race the "easy" days were pretty limited. I'll have taken a total of 5 days off this month as well. Amazingly, I'm running as much, if not more, than I was during cross country season, which hopefully bodes well for the rest of outdoor season!

I'm really excited because I ordered new spikes today! Mizuno Kaze 2 flats for the 5K (which I have become in love with enough that I've decided its worth buying flats for...they were $25, so I don't feel too bad), and Asics Hyper LD spikes for steeple. I'm hoping the Asics will fit since its always hard to tell what you're going to get with men's sizes, but they're way cooler than the women's version and it even mentions the all-mesh upper being ideal for steeplechase. And I got both of these pairs for $18 less than it would have cost to buy the adidas steeple spikes...I'm OK with that.

I felt like I was dragging a bit during the workout tonight, although it didn't show much in my times. 2 miles easy, 2 miles @ "half marathon pace" (7:11, 7:08), 2 minutes easy, 2 miles "half marathon pace" (6:58, 6:55...this may have been excessive, my legs were dead by the end), 3 miles easy/cooldown. I am very happily looking forward to my day off tomorrow, especially since I have 2 fairly major exams on Thursday for which I have to memorize an absurd amount of biochemical reactions, so that's what most of my time is going to be devoted to tomorrow.

I really wasn't going anywhere with this, except to feel good about the fact that this is the first time I've ever run over 200 miles in a month. So, hooray me. :)

Next up: 5K at Oshkosh on Saturday. A year ago, if you'd told me I was going to be running the 5K ever on the track I'd have called you crazy; if you'd told me I'd run it once, LOVE it, and run it again, I would have laughed in your face. Look who's laughing now...

"This is the worst thing in the WORLD": WLC Race Report

As the WLC coach put it: "Well, I guess you all set personal records today for races run under 35 degrees!"
This is definitely a true story.

Only 6 people from the club were awesome enough to race on Saturday, 5 girls and 1 guy, and 5 of us were in the 5K. The nice thing about that was we got to leave the Union at 9:15...luxuriously late for a meet day. The weather was crappy from the start - 32 and windy, and apparently it was only supposed to be windier in Tosa. Greeeeat. When we got to the track, our worst fears were realized - it was FREEZING, with winds gusting up to 30 mph. And if there's one thing I detest while racing, especially in track, its wind. There was a girl running around the track in just her uniform and we thought she was crazily warming up for something...until we realized it was the ONE girl running the 10K. Talk about a champion...we cheered for her for awhile before holing up under the bleachers where it really wasn't much warmer, but it was at least slightly less windy.

We watched Jade run the 1500 which she ended up winning by outkicking a Parkside girl which was pretty sweet. The start was ridiculous because they were waiting for like 5 minutes after everyone took their sweats off for some girl to take her sweet time putting on her spikes, and then another girl didn't understand the concept of lining up by number...it was strange. Which will happen I guess when the only schools in attendance are extremely random, tiny schools from Illinois. After that we had maybe half an hour before we had to go warm up for the 5K...this was seriously the fastest meet in history, I guess because half the races had 1-2 people in them.

I don't think I ever really got nervous for this race because I was so damn cold and that was all I could really think about. Until we started warming up I couldn't feel my feet, and I was more worried about how much it was going to suck taking my sweats off than how much the race itself was going to hurt. Brittany, Claire and I all wore shorts, and all the other girls were freaking out like "aren't you going to freeze?" I was also wearing my underarmor top, a headband, and gloves so it honestly wasn't that awful, especially once we started running. So then the race started. It took awhile to get settled into a pace, especially with the wind kicking your ass on one straight and helping you out on the other. I felt a little frenzied at first, but eventually I fell into a rhythm that really stuck with me throughout the rest of the race. I remember looking at the clock at around 5 minutes and thinking "oh my god...I still have to run for like 15 more minutes"...but that was the only time I really gave any thought to how long the race was. I came through the mile in about 6:35...I was hoping to get out a bit faster, but with the wind and all I wasn't too unhappy about that. Around then, this girl from Parkside ("Kimmy") passed me, but really didn't get too far ahead of me. (I only know her name was Kimmy because I spent the rest of the race being taunted by her teammates/coaches cheering for her at every corner of the track...trust me, I knew her splits like the back of my hand). I didn't feel like making a move at that point, so I kind of tucked in behind her and attempted to draft off of her, but when that didn't really work after a couple laps, I just said screw it and put in a little surge to pass her. Apparently, once I passed her she continued to fall further and further behind me for the rest of the race. I was really proud of how I actually made an effort to actually push through the wind, not just let it kill me and slow down. Everytime I hit the windy straight I would think to myself that in only 100 meters, I would have the wind at my back and it would be fabulous. With 1200 to go I was starting to get tired but not so much that I was dying and slowing down...in fact, I felt strong throughout the race. Finally, at 400 meters left, I threw everything left in me into my kick. I felt great down the back straight and into the final curve...and then I hit the last straight...aka, I ran into a 30 mph wall of wind.

The last stretch seemed to go on FOREVER...it was seriously like running through a tunnel where the finish line keeps on moving further and further away. I couldn't hear anything except the wind whistling in my ears and I kept trying to will myself forward because I REALLY wanted to finish under 21...but alas, there was nothing I could do about the invisible force pushing me back. I finally crossed the line in 21:04, which I'm not sad about in the least considering its the second best 5K I've ever run, and in pretty much the most absurd conditions possible.

I think the thing that made me happiest about this race is how strong I felt throughout it. Now, if I had really been willing to push myself, to really make it hurt, I'm sure I could have PRed. So in that way it isn't good that I think maybe I could have made it hurt more...but its not as if I wasn't tired or wasn't trying. It's the first time EVER that someone has passed me and I've been able to respond, to not just watch them run off while I continue to struggle behind them. And to be honest, its the first time in a race that I have ENJOYED myself. It was the weirdest thing - all my mind could focus on was how good I felt, when usually it clings on to every twinge, ache, and pain that it can find. Also, the fact that I was only 15 seconds off my PR doesn't hurt. I can only imagine what's to come in the rest of this season...all I know is, I will DEFINITELY be running the 5K again. The thing that I think is weird, but kind of cool about the 5K too is that there aren't any really slow people who run it. Like if you suck, they're not going to throw you on the track to suffer for 25 minutes, they'll let you run a 3:30 800 or a 7:00 1500. I could run crappy times in the mile and still beat 20 people, but if I can run a time I'm proud of and beat 3 in the 5K, well I think I'd be much happier with that.

Seriously. I don't even know. What kind of crazy life is it when I go from thinking the 300 m hurdles is the worst thing in the world to LOVING the 5000 m? I did absolutely love it. The rhythm of the race, and the fact that you have time to fix things that go wrong, and just the strange symmetry of it and knowing exactly where you are (unlike in cross country) have just sucked me in. I'm sure I'll get around to steeplechasing eventually, but for now I don't think I'm going to stop until a 5K PR is mine. All mine.

Oh, and then it snowed, and today I ran 12 miles in it, as well as more absurd wind. My left achilles/calf is definitely bugging me, so I'll be icing tonight and hoping it calms down in time for whatever crazy workout is planned for tomorrow.

And if nothing else, I can't say I'll ever complain about weather at a meet ever again. :)

No such thing as easy

If I randomly decide to browse back through my workouts or even through this blog, a common theme in my running becomes pretty obvious: I run faster than I should in every situation except races. Take the workout I did Friday, for example. The plan was to do 4 x [6 minutes @ 10K pace, 4 minutes rest]. I calculated the pace per lap it would take me to run 7:00 miles (52 seconds) figuring that was close enough to 10K pace, even though the last 10K I ran I ran 7:30 pace. Whatever. Anyway, take a guess as to what my first lap was? 48. And this continued throughout the entire workout. My first interval was ~6:20 pace, the second interval I actually finished a mile in 6:05 (yeah...I don't know either.), and finally the last couple I was getting tired (most likely after I, you know, decided to run a 6:05 mile in a workout) and ended up around 6:40 pace...STILL faster than planned. Something similar happened completely by accident today on the long run...my legs felt horrible for some reason and of course we were running through the hills of the Arb. I felt like death most of the time, but I forced myself to finish the 10 (actually, it ended up being 11.4) miles I was supposed to run. I got home and mapped it out. Turns out the pace was 7:39. Uh, no WONDER my legs felt like crap!

Anyway, the bottom line is this: I don't think there's been a workout all season where I haven't been way, way under the pace that I was 'supposed' to be at, and yet it doesn't seem to be showing up in my races. Why? I realize that I don't exactly take my easy days easy either, but it's not like I'm putting in an extreme effort to run hard - 7:30 pace just happens. So I don't know if its a mental thing where I just completely psyche myself out into how much a race is going to hurt just because its a race, or what, but something tells me that I should be racing better than I have been. Not that I had a bad indoor season by any means, but I feel like I should be able to do more, to have that breakthrough and be able to run times I'm consistently happy with. And it seems to me that if running these workouts at these paces isn't hurting me or trashing my legs, then I might as well do them that way, right? How can pushing yourself harder in a workout possibly be a bad thing?

This seems to be occurring more in the past few months than it ever has in my life. I'm flying through workouts at paces that I never would have been able to run in the past, and I feel like I'm not putting in any more effort. I finish workout feeling exhausted, but not dead. Does that mean I'm finally doing something right? I hope so. Maybe this means that distance - real long distance - is where I belong. Scary.

And now, 2 completely non-running related items:
NCAA Tourney - the time of the year when I decide I care about college bball outside of the Badgers. The 1st round game was INCREDIBLE, and beating FSU when everyone said we shouldn't have even made the tournament was pretty sweet. It's too bad we lost today, things kind of fell apart at the end, but we still played a good game and definitely proved we belonged. And I actually picked Xavier to go to the Final 4...so that kind of works out for my bracket, I suppose. I mean, there is a case of beer riding on it for me, which would be excellent. :P

I also just randomly wanted to reminisce about the awful day I had at work on Friday. I work at a dog daycare/hotel (yes, a ridiculous concept, but seriously, I love my job). So I was working the morning shift in the medium sized dog park, and from the very beginning, things were bad. This dog named Max was just being a terror, almost starting fights with everyone, and there were all sorts of other random minor problems with humping and dogs taking cheap shots and yeah...general things that you can't even understand how annoying they are until you're alone and in charge of 26 dogs. Did I mention there were 26 dogs when there were supposed to be 18? Fabulous. So finally, after about 4 hours, they switched Max to the big dog play park...I was soooo happy that things were finally going to calm down...except not. No sooner had he left then a freaking DOG FIGHT breaks out between these 2 dogs, and I have to try to rip them apart. So I had to deal with all that lovely drama, and in the meantime all of these dogs are just barking obnoxiously at me for no reason, always fun. So finally, it's time to leave, and I couldn't be happier to be going home...when all of a sudden I notice one of the dogs is bleeding, from what turns out to be a puncture wound under its eye. And I have NO IDEA what happened since this dog wasn't doing anything all day. So it was just absurd, and I just wanted to cry, and in the whole 10 months I've worked there, this was by far the worst day...ever. Although I guess, I did go home, take a nap, and then do the ridiculous workout I was talking about. So the day wasn't a total waste.

Anyway, outdoor starts on Saturday! We're racing at Wisconsin Lutheran and I think I am running the 5K...which might be the most ridiculous thing I've ever done. I obviously would rather steeple but since a) it's supposed to be a high of 43 and raining, and b) I haven't gone near a steeple barrier, let alone the water jump yet this season, I feel like the chances of running a bad race and/or injuring myself are pretty high...so that might just have to wait. And in the meantime, I guess I'll shoot for a 5K PR. Oh dear.

The luckiest

The past few days haven't been much to speak of running-wise. Ever since Sunday's epic trek around the lake my legs have been feeling pretty sluggish, especially when that was followed up by Edgewood hills on Monday. Yesterday I finally took a day off (my first since March 3 I realized when I looked back at my log...) and it paid off in an incredibly pleasant 8.2 miler with Claire today. Even though the route we took was pretty hilly, I felt great. We stopped at James Madison park on the way back and stood in the lake...Lake Mendota after the winter is nature's ice tub. I haven't done one in awhile because I'm a wuss, but after about 2 minutes of standing in there my feet went numb and it was all good after that. :)

I was talking with Claire about how this season is pretty much the opposite of last year for me - last year, I really wasn't focused, I really didn't care, and honestly, running wasn't making me happy - it was like some kind of chore that I had to do. I didn't do long runs, I completely slacked on the workouts at the end of the season, and I just got so burnt out..it was honestly depressing, because I wanted to WANT to run. I don't know what's different this year, because I'm running more mileage, and more quality mileage at that, but my legs aren't feeling like crap, and I'm still excited to get out there day after day. I want to race, I want to run further, and better, and faster. And I think the thing is besides the fact that I'm actually seeing results from my training, running is just making me happy! And really, isn't that the point of it all? If you're going to struggle through miles and workouts and intervals and races and all of the ridiculousness that it takes to really be able to call yourself a competitive runner, shouldn't it be something that you love, despite its pain and sometimes absurdity? I think I've finally found that. Last year I was content to lay in bed with the BF on a Sunday, not caring in the least that I wasn't doing my long run...and granted, I didn't see him as much last year so there was a certain point where things have to balance out. But this year it doesn't matter if I'm tired, hungover, still drunk for all I care...I'm at Park and Langdon at 10 am...why? Because I love it. I mean, obviously I want to race better, and I'm constantly on a quest for PRs, but if I didn't love it, would I be willing to make that sacrifice for it? Probably not. Bottom line: this season, things finally seem to be coming together for me. I've found the balance between passion and obsession, I'm starting to learn to let bad days and bad races go, and I'm letting myself just enjoy it. Because seriously - what small percentage of the population is able to to what we do? To run 10, 12, 14 miles, to run a mile in under 6 minutes, to not just run for the sake of working out but to compete? And I'm so thankful every day that I go out for a run - from the days when I feel like I'm flying to the days when my legs might as well be made of lead - that by some random turn of events I somehow found this crazy, hilarious, wonderful sport that is distance running.

There's a line in "Again To Carthage" where the main character is contemplating about how in sports, up until a certain point in life, you are always moving forward. Like, you train, each day you get a little better, you PR, you keep training, you get a little better, you PR. Your life is constantly moving forward and you're constantly better than you were yesterday. And that as long as you're there, in your athletic prime, you might as well use it to its fullest and enjoy every minute, because it won't be that way forever. And I think that's part of the reason why I have this blog, because I never want to forget how incredible this running life is - not that I'll ever be done running, but with a team and stuff. We're a special bunch, and however we found our way into this ridiculous sport, we are lucky enough to experience things that most normal people never even imagine.

Going off on random tangents...it's totally why I have this blog.

Oh, and on the topic of luck (both good and bad I guess): St Patrick's Day was quite the entertaining holiday, and much beer was consumed by my roommates and I. We finally made it out of the house at midnight after some ridiculous card games (Irish poker, fittingly :)) and headed to Jordan's Big 10 - a great bar, by the way. Anyway, after playing a few games of shuffleboard we finally sat down and were drinking our beers, when I took a picture and then somehow managed to drop my $300 camera INTO MY BEER. This is like a 16 oz plastic cup...I have no idea what sorts of physics were involved in lining up all those angles but yeah...plop, straight into the beer. It didn't work the next day and I was pretty devastated, and I started looking up things that people did to fix water damage online. Mostly it was just "wait a couple weeks", but one tip was to put it in a plastic bag with rice to help soak up the moisture. Well, I came home from work today, and the BF had apparently discovered that it was working again. SO ridiculous. So, don't drop digital cameras into beer. It's bad.

Ok, time to go back to watching the NCAA tourney. So far I've only had one loss in my bracket that I had going beyond round 2...and since I literally had NO idea what I was doing when I picked my teams, I'd say that's pretty decent.

Did I mention I'm going to train for a marathon this summer? Yeah, more on that one later. :)

Random video: steeplechase is awesome

I found this video on College Humor... its from a meet that my team went to in high school...they randomly had a 1500 meter steeplechase complete with this incredible water pit dug out of a hole in the ground. My coaches never let anyone from my team run it because they didn't want people getting hurt, especially because the meet was right before conference. This is why.

Watch Steeple Chase Topples and more funny videos on CollegeHumor

Lesson learned

So here's something I learned today: it is NOT a good idea to try to go on a 14 mile run after hardly eating anything the day before and only eating yogurt and cereal for breakfast. You WILL feel like crap, your legs will want to fall off, and you will curse the day you became a runner.

However, you will also finish your 14 mile run.

So yes, I finally did what I've been planning to do for awhile now - I ran all the way around Lake Monona. It was quite a daunting task considering I was without my usual WTC long run crew thanks to spring break, but the 55 degree weather and sunshine and the fact that I completely failed at running yesterday beckoned me. By the time I got to Olbrich Park (~5 miles in), I was feeling very hungry. A few miles later, somewhere in Monona, I got lost and ended up adding on over a quarter mile to my distance. By the time I got back by the Alliant Energy Center, I pretty much thought my legs could not possibly continue. But I plodded on...it was seriously deathly. I don't know how the hell I made it home. I did end up stopping a few times just to gather myself and try and convince my legs that yes, it was possible to continue running. Overall I ended up running 7:50 pace besides the stops, which I'm pretty happy with all things considered. And I ran around the lake!! It's funny because I saw a couple guys from the WTC at one point who were doing the same thing, and I saw a group of older guys on one side of the lake going the opposite direction, and then again on the other side. So apparently I am not the only one crazy enough to want to celebrate the gorgeous weather by running 14 miles...no big deal.

So another 50 mile week is in the books. I already can't remember what racing feels like, but with how well workouts have been going lately, I'm pretty excited to back off the mileage a little bit and get ready to RACE again. I just need to start working on some hurdles/steeple training...if only the athletic department will stop being assholes and just let us get on the track...but more about that some other time.

Annnnnd my legs hurt. Perhaps the delicious Capital Brewery Blonde Doppelbock in my fridge will help ease the pain. Combine that with the first grilled-out brat of the season and the fact that I ran 14 miles today, and you pretty much have the best day of spring break ever. Forget Mexico. :)

I'm out on the edge of forever, ready to run

[My apologies from the cheesy song that this post title came from...I'm a little ashamed haha]

So the past week or two have been ridiculously fabulous in terms of workouts. Last Wednesday we were supposed to do a mile at half marathon pace and a mile at 10K pace...well, my "half marathon" pace mile was 6:45, and my "10K" pace was 6:11...on the bike path...in the dark...and it was absolutely fabulous. Then there was Sunday's epic long run in the rain, Monday's workout wasn't as great but that was due to some stomach issues...my legs and everything else felt fine, and so I gutted it out through 12 x 1 minute "5k pack" aka ...6:00-6:10 pace, 1 min easy. THEN on Thursday, we were supposed to be doing 2 miles at half marathon pace...which theoretically should be ~7:20 pace for me (not that I could actually run that for a half marathon, but whatever). I ran with Claire, and we ran 6:44 for the first mile, 6:32 for the second...and I DIDN'T EVEN FEEL TIRED. Not in the least bit. Yesterday I ran 7.5 miles faster than planned, and while today my legs felt like complete shit, I still went for a run.

The bottom line is this: I think I might be in the best shape I've been in in my life. I know for a fact I'm in better shape than I was at this time last season, and I'm plowing through workouts at paces I never could have imagined before in my life. It's exciting and scary all at the same time...because its like I'm on the edge of some times that I know could be amazing, and at this point I think I have the potential to do some awesome things this outdoor season...and I just don't want to be disappointed. But all I know is, I'm feeling great, and I'm running 50 miles a week, and its fabulous. How do you quantify "the best shape of your life"? I never thought I'd be in better shape during track than XC, but I've been running a lot of mileage this track season and just feeling so much more into it that I have in the past...last year, I just hated track and running and was so apathetic about everything, and this year its just like, I'm into it 100%. And it just dawns on me randomly in the middle of workouts and runs just how GOOD I feel...which is something I can't say I've ever experienced before. For all I know, this could be the last chance I have to run the way I am - with a team, and meets, and whatever - and I WILL make it count.

Hence, why I will be doing a tempo run tomorrow no matter how much beer I drink tonight...and tomorrow, I will debut in the distance of 0.10K from Brothers to Brats. Could there be anything more awesome??

The church of long runs

Today when I woke up it was 35 degrees and raining like hell. My alarm went off and I seriously stared at my watch wondering why the hell I was awake and what I had to do at 8:30 in the morning. Oh wait...run...obviously. And somehow, despite the fact that I was at some random party the night before and got almost no sleep (especially with daylight savings time), it turned out to be a GREAT run. 13.3 miles in 1:43...7:45 pace...and I felt fabulous the entire time. Brittany, Claire and I ran a route that I really liked, down Williamson Street and along Lake Monona past a bunch of cool houses and parks into Monona. I don't know what it is, but I LOVE running in the rain. On a day like today when most normal people would refuse to go outside (or, like some of the guys from the club, run 12 miles in a parking garage...I'm not kidding. Runners are so weird :)) I adore being out on the roads soaking wet and thinking about how much of a badass I am for running in this weather. Plus there is just something calming to me about rain...it lulls me into a rhythm that I think I sometimes lack on my long runs because I'm running slower than usual, and half the time have basically thrown myself out of bed and onto the road. But mostly I think its about feeling badass, and thinking about all of the people who aren't out there right now, and how I'm one 13 miler better than any of them.

Long runs are also nice because you have a long time to just kind of think...or if you're me, you have random pieces of random songs floating around in your head (today's selections were "Eidelweiss" and some Guster song that I don't even remember what it was now...why? haha). Of course you talk with the people you're running with, but at a certain point you're just getting tired and everyone is just kind of existing in their own little spheres, but the fact that there's more than one of you just makes you feel better about what you're doing. I was thinking today for some reason about how people more religious than me go to church on Sundays, but me, I attend the church of long runs. If religion is supposed to be about looking inside yourself for a deeper meaning and purpose, I can't see any better way to do that then to spend almost 2 hours pushing your body and being able to spend that time contemplating whatever you choose.

To be continued...because I am exhausted and work at 6:30 am...

Hilarity ensues

If any of you are UW-Madison students or alums, or even if you live in Madison, you probably know of the phenomenon that is the Badger Herald Shoutouts. Basically people can anonymously "shout out" to whatever...something stupid they saw someone say/do, things they like, the weather, something that happened....pretty much, anything at all. Anyway, Monday after practice, Brittany and I were sitting around after doing abs, when suddenly we noticed this guy running with his hands in a really awkward way. At first I thought he just had a really weird running style, but as he kept coming around we realized - he was counting laps. On his hands. And he just looked utterly ridiculous. Not to mention, its not like this guy was any kind of serious runner (although..I guess the fact that he can't count laps in his head kind of gave that one away..), he was running probably over 10 minute mile pace in basketball shorts and one of those SUPER sweet t-shirts with the arms cut off and down the sides. So basically, we decided he was deserving of a shoutout. So here's what I posten:

SO to the guy at the shell counting laps on his hands. I'm sorry you don't know how to count in your head, but seeing you give the world a high five as you came around on your 5th lap just made me laugh.

First of all, it got posted in the paper (which means someone thought it was funny - that always makes me happy). But THEN, today I go browse the online shoutouts section, and here's what I see:
1411. Wednesday, Mar. 4, 2009 @ 1:40pm:

SO to whoever made fun of me for counting laps at the shell. I'd like to see you run over 5 MILES and count all the laps. Funny how the eliptical does that for you...

HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Lets rip this one apart piece by piece, shall we?
1 - Oooh, 5 miles? You must be quite the badass. Especially considering I had just finished an 8 mile track workout, and somehow managed to keep track of all the laps without using my fingers. :)
2 - Elliptical? Ouch. I actually am offended. Too bad the only time I've been on an elliptical in my life was last year when my IT band flared up, and wanted to shoot myself the entire time.
3 - 5 miles..35 laps? I think my brain might explode with the sheer ridiculousness of attempting to count to 35.

Oh boy. Being a competitive runner makes you a little bit of an elitist sometimes. I realize that there are plenty of people in this world better than me at running, but considering I am 100% confident that I could take this kid over any distance, it amuses me that he would think that I'm one of the other group of people I tend to make fun of at the Shell - chicks on the elliptical either reading books, talking on their cell phones, or looking like they spent about an hour doing their hair before they came to work out. But I digress...anyway, I basically almost peed my pants when I read the response. So here's to you, lap counter guy...I hope you continue to be super proud of your "over 5 miles", and that you know that if I ever see you at the Shell again, I will still be laughing at you.

Tonight's workout calls for 2 miles easy, 1 mile @ half marathon pace, 3 minutes easy, 1 mile @ 10k pace, 2 easy, 3 x 300 @ 5K pace. Let's see...thats something like 7 miles? Let's see if I can manage to do it without counting on my hands. :)

Pure bliss.

Today when I went for my run it was 35 degrees, windy, and raining. Not exactly prime conditions for a phenomenal run, right?
Wrong.

I don't know what the hell was going on today, but I felt AMAZING. And I apparently wasn't just feeling fast, I WAS fast, averaging 7:16 mile pace...yet hardly feeling like I was putting in an effort. I was splashing through puddles like a little kid and just laughing at the wind and rain blowing in my face. Sometimes, I think I just run better when I feel like a badass just for getting out there - I mean, I saw ONE other runner out the entire time, and it was a Badger guy. And something about my designated "Thursday" route is just wonderful - around the UBay fields and down the bike path along University...it seems short somehow, even though I measured out the run today and even underestimated it a little, and it turned out to be 7.75 miles. But it just flies when I'm running it for some reason. Maybe it's because Thursdays are always just insane, and just getting out there and cruising for like an hour in my own little world gets me through it. When I got back to the Nat I realized that there was a definite hot spot on my right big toe...I'd been running through ankle deep puddles of ice water so I really wasn't too concious of what was going on with my feet while I was running, but sure enough, a GIANT blood blister. Ouch. But you know what? Worth it.

I couldn't help but smile as I came cruising down the hill by the UBay fields, with "Baba O'Reilly" blasting through my headphones, water splashing everywhere, and my legs feeling like they could go, go, go forever. I don't have to win races, I don't need people to know my name, when it comes down to it, I love running because of days like this.

"If a McDonald's quarter pounder with cheese were running a marathon..."

May I present the most horrible commercial ever:


When I saw this commercial during House on Monday, all I could do was just sit and stare in horror. They seriously put a McDonald's quarter pounder with cheese and running a marathon in the same sentence? Those two things don't even belong in the same dimension. I have nothing against the occasional McDonald's binge when I'm hungover or after a meet craving pure grease, but running a marathon? Really McDonald's? It supposedly would "show up without even training, because its 100% pure meat and real cheese, it can do this". Well I'd love if I could run the 3K in 10 flat because "I'm really awesome, I can do this", or go out and run a marathon right now for the same reason...but sadly, that isn't the case. As my friend Jade said: "If a quarter pounder were running a marathon, it would die of clogged arteries at mile 5".

Awesome workout Monday. Does working at 6:30 and skipping class just make me ready to kick ass by 5:30? I don't know. We did 10 x [1 min @ 5K pace (uhh...which was kind of more like...somewhere between mile and 3k pace...) and 1 min easy]...I ran with Claire the whole time and it ended up averaging out to 7 minute pace, even with the easy parts....hmmm...win? I just suck at doing workouts at their proper pace. If I feel good, I want to go fast, and why not? I'm training to run fast, aren't I? It would be different if I was killing myself to run whatever ridiculous pace I picked, but I think I just took a relatively easy workout and turned it into an awesome one. I don't know. Long ago my high school coach told me "If you raced the way you practice, you'd be our 4th or 5th runner on varsity" (In reality, I was about the 2nd-3rd runner on JV) And still, I think sometimes I tend to push it in practices. But whatever...a month of no racing will not be a bad thing. Time to train hard, get strong, and not feel bad about running 7 mile tempo runs on Thursdays just because its sunny and I'm feeling good. :)

All we know is distance

I was geeking out so much over my race on Saturday that I couldn't really think of anything to post on this until now...even now, I'm not really sure how to explain my race or how I feel about it, but I'm going to try because I feel like it's significant to me, and if its any indication of how outdoor season is going to go, then I am really, really looking forward to outdoor!

One of the few nice things about having a meet at the Shell is not having to get up at some ungodly hour and drive somewhere. I woke up around 9:30, had breakfast, and just hung out goofing around with the BF for a couple hours - it did NOT feel like I had a race. I went over to the Shell around 12:30 which turned out to be kind of pointless since no one from our club was running until 2, but Jade and Brittany and a few other people were there so we just hung out, watched the invitational 1200 (it's always fun watching people run your 400 pace for a 1200. yup.) and the prelims of the sprints and whatnot. I didn't actually start getting nervous about my race until the women's mile started - part of me wished that I had run that instead, just so I could be done. Jade ran an awesome race, she ended up going sub-5:30, and my other teammates ran well too. We watched the guys mile, and then Claire, Brittany, and I (the 3K crew) went to go warm up.

Everytime I warm up for a distance race, especially the 3K, I wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life. And how I got here - wait a second, wasn't it just 3 years ago that I was a SPRINTER? And now I'm running a serious long distance event? This can't be right...this can't be right at all. Its always during my warmup that all my doubts bubble up to the surface, as the 3 of us jog silently around the McClain center, each lost in our own world of thinking about the race. All of your senses are in hyperdrive - is that a side cramp coming on? My breathing doesn't feel right...that left hamstring feels really tight - each random twinge signaling disaster for your race. And yet we jog on, as time ticks down towards the moment when we'll be on that line, staring down 3000 meters of track.

So we came back out to the track, and time seemed to just slooooow down...every race seemed to have more heats than it was supposed to, and I kept doing strides and stretching nervously because I had nothing better to do. In this race, as with most distance races, it wasn't so much running well that I was worried about, although obviously I hoped that's what would happen, but it's just knowing that what you're about to do is going to hurt very, very badly, whether you run your best race ever or your worst. We talked to our coach about what we wanted our splits to be - I said I was shooting for 12 flat-ish, and no splits over 50, and Claire joked with me that I was shooting for 11:50, which I laughed off - yeah right, dropping 22 seconds? That's hilarious. Finally, it was time. We lined up, and then, the gun.

Probably the strangest thing about this race was that I basically ran it alone. Everyone was seeded above me by a pretty large margin, and the one girl who wasn't ended up running a 10:52...and your seed time was a 12:16 why? I honestly can't even say what was going through my mind during the race. I started out in 44, and knew that I had to pull back a bit, but even so my next couple laps were 45 and 46. I came through the mile in 6:12 and all I kept telling myself was "don't slow down. DON'T SLOW DOWN". Of course, I had no idea whether or not I actually was slowing down, or where my competition was, or anything at all for that matter. My only awareness was of the red track stretching out in front of me, the occasional call of my name from a random point on the backstretch, and splits. I kept listening for splits. A couple of times, they didn't come, and I assumed that meant that I had fallen off pace; that my coach didn't want to tell me...but looking back, that makes absolutely no sense, since you would think she would want to alert me that I was off. But aside from listening for splits, only one thought ran through my head - the number of laps to go. Over and over and over...5, 5, 5, 5, 5, like some kind of crazy cadence in my mind. With 4 laps to go, I finally heard another split - "48!" It suddenly dawned on me that I hadn't dropped off pace. All I had to do was make it through 4 more laps without slowing down, and I would PR. After that there was nothing - I just ran. I ran, and ran, and with each lap and the call of another "48" I came closer to home. I had completely given up looking at the clock by the time I reached the last lap. KICK!! I poured it on with everything I had left in me. Coming into the final straight, I finally looked up at the clock and saw 11-something...my eyes were blurry from the dry air and the effort so I had no clue, and in my haze I thought it was 11:5-something...at that moment, all that mattered to me in the world was reaching the finish line before that 11 became a 12. And in one last glorious moment as I crossed the line before I bent down hands-to-knees and commenced sucking air like I would never breathe again, I saw the glorious, glorious number:
11:50.
A 22 second PR. I couldn't even believe it. As it turns out, I didn't run a single lap over 48. And that's the thing about this race - yes, I only beat 1 person. But I finally RACED. Even though there was no one else there to race with, I dug down and pulled out what I knew I had. I actually executed the race the way I wanted to - for ONCE in my life! And I don't even feel like I'm anywhere close to my peak this season, especially with the training I've been doing so far. So I guess I'm really going to have to work on that water jump, because I am ready to kick some 3K steeplechase ass in outdoor.

I love long distance. Who would have ever guessed?

all we know is distance
we're close and then we run

She said, I think I'll go to Boston

I didn't get into Wisconsin. And I've never been so happy to get a rejection letter in my life.

I'm deferring for a year - emotionally, financially, its the better idea. And I'm moving to Boston in August, then starting PT school next May. It's going to be tough, but its going to work. Why do I bother working myself up so much about these things? Everything works out in the end. And though I'm not a big believer in fate, sometimes I do feel like everything happens for a reason. So I'm going on an adventure!! And I can't wait. :)

Yesterday's workout was awesome. I don't even know if it was that hard, or if it was supposed to be that hard, but it was genuinely fabulous. Maybe it's because I was just in such a good mood anyway, but I felt unstoppable. Minute runs of 6-5-4-3-2-1, with 1 minute rest, theoretically starting at 10K pace and working down to mile pace...well, I was already at sub-7 pace for the 6 minute run, and by the time I got to the 1 minute I was running something like 5:05 mile pace...too bad that's NOT my mile pace...hah. Anyway, I felt great the entire time. Like I was flying...so I'm hoping that bodes well for my last indoor race of the season on Saturday.

I have 2 exams on Thursday and studying is not going well, so I should get back to that. But everything is good. It's all good. :)

I wanna dance a tango with chance

I realize I haven't written in awhile and so this is most likely going to be a completely random assortment of thoughts...bear with me. There are lots of random things floating around in my head sooo I guess its about time they were spewed out on paper...or internet, or whatever.

First off, the never-ending Boston debacle. It's really complicated to explain the whole situation but basically its a financial thing and therefore pretty much completely out of my control. Which is the most frustrating thing about it - I am absolutely powerless to do anything about this situation. There's really no point in fighting with my mom about it - there's nothing to fight about, its just facts, there in black and white - she can't give me money that she doesn't have. Simple as that. But at the same time, I just can't accept the fact that I can't do this thing that I want SO badly because of the amount it would cost to move there. And I just can't spend the next 3 years of my life constantly regretting and wishing and wondering how much different and better my life would be if I had just been able to do that one thing. I'm sending in my $200 deposit tomorrow; my spot is saved. And I'm just hoping and praying that I'll actually get to take it. If it were at all reasonable to defer and take a year off, I would do it, but that would mean having to start paying back my undergrad loans, which would basically defeat the purpose of taking a year off to work - I wouldn't be saving anything. So yeah. Things aren't good on that front. I'm pretty much trying to exist with it in the back of my mind and not think about it unless I have to, because it just puts me in a bad mood and makes me feel like curling up in a ball and crying to think that I might not be able to go there.

But onto more exciting things - like running! So I never wrote a Stevens Point race report because I was lazy, but it was a pretty fun and interesting meet. I ended up having to run the 3K first because I was in the slow heat and they were counting on the meet to take forever, so they ran that and the slow heat of the men's 5K at the beginning. My legs felt kind of crappy on my warmup, but I was still excited - I think that's the thing that has made me decide to go LD all the way...because everytime I've raced the mile this season, I've absolutely DREADED it...but the 3K makes me all pumped even though I know its going to suck. I was seeded first in my heat which was really strange and wrong on so many levels...there were a ton of no time girls who I was pretty sure would be faster than me, but I ended up getting out in first and leading for a couple laps - WEIRD FEELING. Obviously I got passed after a bit, but my first lap was 44 and the next 2 were both 46. Then obviously I started to slow down - I was aiming for 48s, but by the mile I was right about where I wanted to be - 6:22. Unfortunately I couldn't hold the pace and I slowed down to 51s for pretty much the entire second half of the race....I was following behind this stupid UMD girl who was running on the inside of the track for like the entire thing which was really bothering me. I think when I race my mind just grabs onto weird things that annoy me - something stupid a girl near me is doing, a piece of paper on the track, the fact that my feet are hot - and just throws them around in a sad attempt to focus on something other than the fact that I'm killing myself slowly via running. But anyway, I don't know where I pulled it out of, but for my kick I rocked out a 40. I passed like 3 people in the last lap, and seriously, I really don't know where it came from...the jets just turned on I guess. I ended up running a 12:12...20 seconds faster than last week and basically 11 seconds faster per mile...yeah, that's a lot. Overall I was really pleased with my race, and I feel like with some more concentrated training I could definitely run under 12...because let's face it, starting out my time with 11 would just look much prettier. :)

Then I ran the mile. Which was a really unfortunate, bad decision. I pretty much knew from the moment I started warming up that things were not going to go well - I'd run an all out 3K, and even though it had been a couple hours I'm obviously not in the kind of shape where I can be doubling like that. And what a disaster it was. I was planning on trying to go out more conservatively (as in, 43 not 40)...well, I went out in 43, and I already felt like I was dying. I don't think I have ever wanted to drop out of a race more than I did from that one. I felt god-awful, everyone was passing me, and I knew that my time was going to completely suck. But there was one thing that kept me from giving up altogether - the Point girl who tripped me at Carthage was in the race. And she passed me. And there was no way in hell I was letting her beat me. Finally, with 2 laps to go I got ahead of her and stayed there, and despite the fact that my kick was a pathetic 43, I managed to pass 2 more people in the last lap. I ended up running a 6:10, and was basically left with an overwhelming feeling of never wanting to run the mile again.

So I didn't race this weekend because I wanted to take the weekend off for the sake of my legs, and of course to spend Valentine's Day with the BF. But of course being me and never being able to turn down racing (and wanting to get a workout in that I knew would be a lazy 5 miles otherwise), I ended up racing the UW Running Club Valentine's Day 5K. I pretty much ran it as a tempo run, my first mile was 7:11 and I actually negative splitted, which is kind of funny since I was just trying to hold pace. I passed a lot of people and only got passed once, ended up finishing in 22:08 and got 14th for women, 61st overall. All in all, not a bad performance considering I pretty much decided I wanted to do it like 20 minutes beforehand. And road races are so nice...I love being an a situation where if I don't feel like killing myself, I don't feel obligated to. :)

Today's long run was amazing. Basically any time I get into double digit mileage on a run I'm left feeling so good about myself that I completely forget how much it sucked while I was doing it. I was a bit hungover from the track club shindig the night before, and so the way out was extremely unpleasant...then on the way back, we were running into a killer headwind, but for some reason I started feeling exponentially better and by the time I got home I felt fantastic. My knees are hurting a little now - I really need to get some new shoes - but it was 12 miles of awesome. We ran up State Street around the capitol where they were having a cyclocross race which was quite entertaining to watch, then down around Lake Monona and onto the bike path past Olin Park. It was a really beautiful, sunny day, even though it was cold. The only sad part of the run was that I lost one of my awesome Nike running gloves! I had taken them off because my hands get ridiculously hot sometimes when I run, and at that point we weren't running into the wind, and I put them in my pockets...sometime about half an hour later, I realized one of them had fallen out. :( Luckily it wasn't the one with my house key in the pocket...that would have been really problematic.

I should stop rambling! There's so much other crap I should be doing right now, but I just get so excited about running that I go on and on. Today a girl in my biomechanics lab group was talking about how she did the Valentine's 5K and it was her first race ever, and she asked me how you build up to running 12 miles...and I seriously just get giddy when I talk about that. Running is truly my passion...whether or not I'm winning races or running fantastic times isn't really relevant to how incredible I feel when I'm cruising along some random path somewhere and feeling like I'm invincible.

I also had a glorious Valentine's Day. The BF and I cooked dinner from the "Intercourses" cookbook my sister got me, and now I understand why these foods are apparently aphrodisiacs. It was possibly one of the best dinners I've ever had. The coup de grace was the main course - seared sea scallops stuffed with this incredible basil puree and asparagus with some really wonderful spicy, crunchy topping. Mouth-gasm? Yes. And of course I'm lucky to be able to spend the day with my favorite person in the entire world. :)

OK, I think I'm finally done for now.

[Final random comment, I'm doing a dance to "Going North" by Missy Higgins for Optima, and its been in my head pretty much constantly over the past week, and I realize that it has nothing to do with running but the lyrics kind of make me think of when you're all along in some sort of beautiful, natural place (like the Arb) running and feeling like everything is perfect and right in the world.]

up where the hunted hide unseen
under the arms of eyeless trees
up where the answers fall like leaves
where your love is all i need
i'm going north

I strolled alone through a fallout zone

I feel like the last few days have been like watching my dreams crumble. I'm not going into the details right now, because I feel like if I try to explain myself to one more person today my head is going to explode, but suffice it to say, I'm frustrated. I'm frustrated with running and my legs and the fact that I ran a shit, shit, shit mile time on Saturday (and doubling is no excuse for that kind of shit), and even when I kill myself in the 3K I'm still 20th/27, and I'm never going to be able to go to Boston because I don't have the money, but according to my mother things would be fine if I was paying $10,000 more a year for tuition in Chicago, because I could drive there for orientation so it would all be good.

I want more than anything else to be financially independent. All I want is to have the money to just DO THIS. I've spent my entire life in my comfort zone...in life, in running, in everything. I'm sick of it. I refuse to sit and wonder what would have happened if I had taken that one chance.

My head just feels like its going to explode right now. I have no idea what I'm doing, I don't know what I should be doing, and I feel like I have no one to help me. My dad says he supports me, which is great and all, except that's really not much use when all my problems are financial and there's nothing he can do about that. I don't think I've ever felt this frustrated, angry, upset...I don't even know. I wish I did. I need to, and I don't have a clue, and I'm on my own.

Again to Carthage

I've run a race at Carthage College 7 years running. It's the place where I won the only race I have ever won: 55 highs and lows at Woodland Conference indoor senior year of high school. It's also the place where I came out of nowhere to place 2nd in 55 lows as a sophomore and fell in finals as a junior. Basically, there are a lot of memories for me in the Tarble Athletic Center, and when it dawned on me that this could be my last time racing there (at least for awhile), it made me a little sad. That said...I think this meet left a lasting impression...it seriously had to be one of the most ridiculous days/races ever.

First of all, I accidentally got drunk on Friday night. I promise, I did NOT plan on this. I was thinking I was being all good, drinking a couple beers slowly and drinking water constantly, etc. Well, as it turns out, I had 2 full pints of 10% ABV beer (Ale Asylum Mercy and Bell's Hopslam, which I must say, was absolutely spectacular). Then of course, Andrew and I stayed up talking for like an hour, and in the end I got about 4 or 5 hours of sleep....obviously, a GREAT start to a double race day. Before we even left Madison, we saw a hitchhiker and a man dressed up as the statue of liberty standing on the median of East Wash...clearly, this day was going to be ridiculous.

We arrived in Kenosha around 10, with the meet scheduled to start at 11. I was feeling exhausted and kind of sketchy at that point, but once we started warming up for the mile I started feeling better. We warmed up on this amazing path next to Lake Michigan, and the weather was fantastic - around 35 and sunny. It was so pretty I had to take a picture:
So we got done warming up outside, and just kind of hung around stretching and doing strides and stuff. 6 out of the 7 girls who went to the meet were running the mile, which was kind of ridiculous. Both of the girls in the first heat ran 5:43...pretty awesome. I was in the second heat with 3 other girls from my team...hoping to finish ahead of at least a couple of them, but sadly that was not the case. Once again, I went out in 40 for the first lap which I immediately regretted - my hamstrings started to cramp up terribly and I just couldn't keep pace with the other WTC girls who were starting to pull ahead. By the 5th lap, I was just trying to hang on and keep the girl in front of me in range. Finally, we got to the last lap, and I tried to drag something out of me for a kick. The clock was at 5:15 when I came around and I knew that I was going to be incredibly angry if I didn't run sub-6...so I started to try to pull something together for the last lap. In the meantime, I had gotten right behind this girl ("girl in the red shorts" and was getting ready to pass her, except this other girl from Benedictine was straddling the lane line and I could not for the life of me get around her. Obviously I could have just gone to the outside, but I didn't really feel like running the curve in lane 3, so I was just sitting behind the two getting increasingly irritated. Finally, we got into the final straight and I was so done with this situation - I squeezed in the gap between the two and passed the obnoxious tall girl first, and pulled even with the other girl...who then stopped short of the line and I ended up beating her by a 10th of a second. The thing is, I'm really annoyed that those girls were there...because I found out later that 2 of my teammates finished only a second in front of me...and I feel like if I had been aware that they were there, I would have pushed it harder the last couple of laps. But anyway, I finally ran a sub-6 for the season (5:58) and improved on my season best by 2 seconds again, so I guess I can't complain too much.

So we had some time before the 3K...I watched some other WTCers race the 600, 800, and 1000, then we went to warm up when they started the 200s because there were 20 heats of that or something. I spent way too long trying to figure out what spikes to wear...seriously, I brought every pair of spikes I own to this meet. I didn't want to wear my Asics that I wear for the mile because I figured my shins would hurt, and I didn't have time to clean out my XC spikes, so I ended up wearing a pair of spikeless Nike Zoom Janas that I stole from my sister's closet...I think she wore them once for indoor pole vault or something. They're identical to my XC spikes except spikeless, and they're silver and powder blue and awesome! They didn't feel too good with socks, but I took my socks off and they fit perfectly! In the meantime, we had also decided to enter a 4 x 400...which I was going to be in. Kickass? I think so.

Brittany and I were doing some striders and stuff waiting for the 200s to be done...I went to get some water when all of a sudden Taylor was yelling at me "they're starting!" So yeah....I almost missed my race. I had to sprint across the infield and arrived at the starting line with my heart pounding and completely breathless...an ideal way to start an almost 2 mile race. But wait, it gets better. The gun went off, and I went through the first lap in about 41 seconds. Everyone was in a pack, but people started to peel off, and by halfway through the second lap I was running with Claire just in front of me, a Stevens Point girl on my ass, and Brittany just behind her. And then, just before the second curve, it happened.

To be completely honest, I couldn't tell you exactly what occurred, but all I know is all of a sudden I felt something catch my back leg, and then I was down. On my knee that was already causing me problems. My guess is that SP girl was riding way too close and caught my leg. It was one of those moments that it takes you a second to figure out what's actually going on, but as soon as I did I was up and sprinting around the curve. I HAD to pass that girl. I got next to her on the curve, and for the first, and probably last time in my life, I threw an elbow. Unnecessary? Maybe. It's not like I hit her, I just made a little contact. I was pissed, and there was nothing else I could think of to do but that. The hilarious thing is some guys who were sitting on the side of the track definitely saw it, and so I heard "oooooh" coming from the sidelines as I passed her and went on my merry way...haha.

Well obviously this put me at a huge disadvantage - Claire was now a solid 15 meters ahead of me, I'd wasted a bunch of energy sprinting around the girl, and my rhythm was totally gone. I was trying to keep track of my splits but I kept forgetting to hit my watch so that was honestly no help whatsoever haha. I was trying to get myself back into some kind of groove. 15 laps is A LONG TIME. I kept pretending I was on the track at the shell...just count to 7 twice, and then kick for the last lap. The last half mile was basically torture - I had nothing left and it was all I could take just to stay on something that resembled my pace. Somewhere around my 2nd last lap, I LAPPED the girl who tripped me (hah), though this does irritate me because there's no reason she should have been riding my ass if I was going to beat her by a MINUTE. I had almost no kick, but I finally finished in 12:32. I wasn't that pleased, since I was really hoping to beat my seed, but I'm also pretty sure that between the sprinting across the gym and the getting tripped and falling, that's at least 15-20 seconds I could take off my time pretty easily. I'm not going to lie - I really, really liked the race. Something about the longer but slightly slower pace seems to be working better for me than the kamikaze death sprint of the mile...so I definitely think I'll be running it again. But for the first race in an event - holy crap, it doesn't get much more ridiculous than that.

But let's not forget that I still had to run the 4 x4! And seriously, I love that race. Always have, always will. I think the think I love about it is that I never really care if my team does well, or even if I run that well, its just the adrenaline rush of sprinting all out and it being at the end of the meet with everyone watching. And to make things even more ridiculous...I ran ANCHOR. Hahahaha...that's just silly. I smiled through my whole leg haha...even stuck out my tongue at Jade for a picture. It was pretty fantastic. Our all-distance crew did our best :)

We finally left at around 5 but the fun was just beginning...it was really windy so apparently all this snow had blown from the surrounding fields to build up to like 4-5 inches on the highway...and apparently so many cars had gone into ditches that the state patrol closed the road! Sooo we had to take a half hour detour through Kenosha to find our way back to the freeway...then I somehow got off of 94 but luckily it didn't end up being a problem...and THEN I got pulled over because one of my headlights was out. Seriously. And the cop thought I was in high school...sad! By the time I finally made it home I basically just wanted to lay..my legs were cramped up so badly since we didn't cool down after the 4 x 4, and my shins and knee were killing me. But hey! It was an amazing meet. I love Carthage, and like I said, I'll never forget that track...and it's sort of fitting that I would fall there :P. I mean, I was used to falling in hurdle races, but distance? That's just crazy.

And yet, even though my races weren't great, even though I fell, if there's one thing I'll miss when/if I move to Boston, it will be days like this.