Lookin' good in red: Cape Ann 25K

I raced, I raced, I raced, I raced, I raaaaced! And it was - it had to be - that thing that I desperately needed to wake my mind up, give it a good shake, and be like "HELLO, you love this shit...and you are in way better shape than you even know....so get your act together and let's kick some ass, shall we?"

So what was the race where I chose to make my glorious return after 3 months off of racing? Why, one of the hilliest, hardest distance races in New England, of course!  Basically, the sum of all of the things I heard about Cape Ann before running it would go something like this "holy hell HILLS there are so many HILLS and you die and you should expect to run slow because of the HILLS they just never end...oh but it's by the ocean so it's pretty." Needless to say, I wasn't exactly super pumped for the race, but marathon training makes us do some crazy things and I think I knew that I needed some sort of stimulus to get myself out of my mental slump - running a crazy hilly race would be just the thing, right?  I really kind of forgot I was racing until I was standing on the start line...I didn't buy any Gu for the race, didn't really prepare any special way, and was just kind of like...woo hoo, this will be fun and random and an insta-PR!

So I was up bright and early Monday morning - so weird to race on a Monday since those are usually my time honored day off - and headed to Gloucester to run through the hills for 15.56 miles. We went on an interesting warmup/adventure to avoid the INSANE porta potty lines (when will race directors learn that 12 porta potties isn't enough for 700 runners with pre-race nerves?), then I hunted down the GBTC coach to get my singlet...yes...believe it or not...I am now an official GBTC runner!  Only took me a year to get up the guts to join, but if there's one way to improve its to run with a group and run with faster runners...so while I can't help but be intimidated by a lot of the women on the team (case in point: our top 2 women took 2nd and 3rd female overall at Cape Ann) I know all I can do is train to be the best runner I personally can be, and running with such an incredible group is going to help me get there.  So putting on my new, red singlet for the first time was really, really exciting. :)  Soon enough we were on the line...after some confusion between the starts for the 25K and 7K and with zero announcements or ado, some kind of weird horn sounded and we were off!

I didn't really know what kind of pacing strategy to go with given that the race was longer than a half and the course was way hillier than any half I had ever run before, so I just decided to focus on staying relaxed and focused and see how things developed.  I kept myself entertained the first few miles by counting hills (the course claims "16 major hills"...considering I counted 14 in the first 8 miles, I'd say there were quite a few minor ones as well) and trying to escape the conversations about IT band problems, travel, and boats being had by random groups of middle aged men nearby.  Around mile 3 a little kid yelled "only halfway there!" and I kind of laughed...I wished! But so far things were feeling pretty good despite the hills - I was just focusing on maintaining effort up the hills and not hammering, then getting my breath and my legs back on the flats and downhills and just preparing for the next climb.  Throughout the race there were spectators kind of scattered throughout (including some random drum circles and a 'mile 11.85 aid station'), and it was really cool to once in awhile hear someone yell "Go Greater Boston!" in my direction...I had to smile every time. It inspired me too to run just a little bit harder, because hell, if you run for GBTC people assume you are FAST!

For most of the first half of the race most of my thoughts were being perplexed that I was feeling so good.  I was really holding my own spot in the pack, and I just felt really relaxed and smooth, like the hills weren't really affecting me at all.  I just kept ticking off the miles - 7:43, 7:37, 7:37, 7:39, 7:47, 8:01, 7:53, 7:25 - just letting it ride with the ups and downs of the hills and holding a steady relaxed effort.  By mile 8 I was getting lulled into the rhythm of the run and feeling quite secure about my life...and then we turned a corner and I was staring down a hill of death and destruction. Hoooooooly crap I thought that thing was never going to end....I so desperately wanted to walk, but one of the pros of hanging with a faster bunch of people in a race is that people at that pace aren't going to walk up a damn hill at mile 8...so I just gritted my teeth and hauled some ass up the hill.  When I hit the top I'm pretty sure I sounded like I was actively in the process of dying...enough so that some random woman asked me "are you ok, sweetie?"  Argh...ok...so yeah I sounded somewhat death-like but we had just run up an 800 meter hill and sometimes I breath loud when I'm working HARD...no need to go all condescending with the 'sweetie' crap. Sooo obviously the best course of action was to immediately pass her to show her that indeed, i was just peachy.  Heh.

Miles 9-12 were kind of a blur...the pack kept weaving from side to side of the street which was...odd....and traffic got really sketchy and sort of disorganized - a couple of cops directing things or cones creating a lane for the runners would have been nice. We ran through a cute little seaside town which was very pretty as far as I can remember, and I started focusing on reeling the few women I could see ahead of me in and getting past them.  There was awhile where I was leapfrogging with a cluster of 3 girls, one who looked about my age, and every time I thought I would clear them on a hill they would catch me on a flat.  Finally I just kind of said to myself, OK, now or never.  Get past them and STAY past them, because you're going to be beyond mad if you let them get away or even keep them in range and then have them blow you up with a kick at the end.  The mile markers were off I'm pretty sure during this section (as much fun as it was to look down and see 7:05 for a mile split, the 8:46 that followed was much less exciting...and both were untrue) but I was still staying relatively smooth and feeling relatively relaxed. I was apparently starting to get warm too, which I didn't really realize until I ran through a water stop, drank some water, and dumped the rest on my head, and it felt SO good.  It was like...oh...I guess I was hot? Haha. Obviously fatigue was starting to sink in quite a bit, but still nowhere near what I was thinking I would feel based on the horror stories I had heard.  I came through the half around 1:42 which is my second best half ever, hilariously.

After that I pretty much just really wished that the race had been a damn half marathon instead of a 25K...because the last 2.56 miles seemed to take forevvvver.  The field was really spread out by that point so while I did reel in one more woman and pass her around mile 15, there wasn't a whole lot competition wise to really hang onto. Somewhere in mile 14 was the second hill that really stands out in my memory, mainly because my quads were getting ready to curl up and die, then I came up to this big hill.  You get to the top and you think you're heading straight over the hump to a downhill, but instead a volunteer points you to turn right and you keep. heading. uphill. CRUEL! But by this point I knew I hadn't slowed down that much and that I had, in my mind, 'won', because I honestly went into the race thinking I was going to struggle to hold 8:20s based on my long run pace lately and what I had heard about the course.  Mile 15 was at sort of a desolate stretch right before we went under a highway, and it was like...ahhh...soooo close...then we ran up the BRICK WALL hill which I knew was coming, but was just this short but absurdly steep hill leading up to the finish.  Up the hill, DONE with hills, kick kick kick, through the finish....and DONE!  2:01:25...7:49 pace.  Holy effing crap!  Because the deal with Cape Ann is this - apparently, given the extreme difficult of the course and how far out it is from Baystate, the pace you run at this race is supposedly a good indicator of the type of pace you could run at Baystate (ie, a flat marathon). Excuse me.....what?  Obviously there's only so much stock you can put in that sort of thing, but both Kelly and her husband said that last year it held true for them within a few seconds per mile.  Needless to say, that would be INSANE and I would probably die of happiness.

Basically, I'm really pleased with and proud of my performance.  It was so incredible to remember what it's like to RACE...and to run a solid race at that.  I've never felt so strong on hills in my life, and it was really excellent to see that all of the hill running I've been doing has actually been having some sort of effect.  Considering the last race above a 5K where I didn't crash/burn/want to cry/fail at was New Bedford....6 MONTHS ago...it was spectacular and really important I think to get that feeling and remember it...to not forget that while there are times and races when running just plain sucks, there are also times and races when you surprise yourself and things are just wonderful.   I think racing longer races is a great thing for me mentally and physically in this marathon training cycle...so logically, my next move is to race the Nahant 30K this coming weekend.  Long runs are WAY more fun when you do them with friends...right? :)

The 2nd Annual WTC Beer Mile: A "Race" Report

Look you guys! A post! Yes they are a bit few and far between these days but I'm sure you understand - pretty much this blog for me has always been a place to aimless ramble about whatever strikes me, when the mood strikes me...and that can be once a week, once a month, once a day, whatever.  Just know that I don't think I'll ever "give up" this blog - it's too much fun having a place to write race reports and fly off on random running related tangents - but that there may be some unannounced hiatuses...never fear, I'll always come back eventually. :)

Well I am proud to say that in my absence I have set my first PR in quite a while....not in a real distance per se, but I am still kind of proud of myself nonetheless...I PRed in the beer mile by over 2 minutes! I don't think I ever got around to writing about the first ever WTC beer mile held last year, but I kind of spearheaded the idea as a fun summer event for the club, we had a huge turnout and some pretty impressive performances.  For those who don't know, a beer mile is where you drink a beer...then run 400 meters...and then repeat x 4.  It's quite the test of both running and drinking endurance and usually the winner is someone who has the right combination of both of those things. Last year we had a HUGE turnout, with 2 heats and a bunch of non-runners included in the competition.

                   

Last year's beer mile finishers...an impressive crew

So I finally finished up with summer PT school classes on Thursday, and decided attending the 2nd annual beer mile would be an excellent reason to make a trip back to my glorious Madison, see my track club friends, and have a great, relaxing weekend to follow up 3 months of summer school.  I got into Madtown on Saturday and after spending some time at the terrace and heading out for a 6 mile tempo with Jade, it was race time!  There were way, way fewer finishers this year...5 to be exact.  I didn't really think I was going to be successful at all, but apparently a year of savoring good beer instead of downing crappy beer (and maybe a little help from the 3 marathons I've trained for in the interim) has made me an unstoppable force.

Me leading the women's race (of 2), my friend Jade (a much faster runner) behind me

After about 2 laps, I may or may not have been a little tipsy, and running seemed wayyy more fun than it had before. The guy who ended up winning lapped the entire field, finishing in 7:04...you have to admit, that's extremely impressive.  I finished 3rd overall in 11:06..a 2 minute PR!  And yes, believe it or not, PRs are still exciting when they're in completely pointless made-up races.  I still got excited trying to beat Jade.  The beer mile really sums up our club pretty well - we are pretty hardcore about running, but we are hardcore about having fun too. 

2010 beer mile finishers! Looking only slightly worse for the wear.

Of course we went out afterward...there was beer pong, Topper's pizza, cheese curds, beer stock exchange, shuffleboard, and a late night trip to the OP among other things.  However, none of that Madison insanity kept me from running 18.6 miles on Sunday...which to be honest, I am amazed I actually accomplished that.  Another girl from the club was running 21 for marathon training, and Jade and my friend Claire were each doing 13 or so, so we went out in the arboretum, hit up about 3 miles of trails, finished the loop and then went out towards Lake Monona/Monona Bay just in time for sunset...gorgeous!  I spent basically the entire day completely dreading the run, but it was incredible how fast 2:32 flew after the first 45 minutes or so.  Having friends to run with was just a blast and once again reminded me why I adore my WTC girls so much. :) 

So fantastically, despite this weekend being a "vacation" for me - I made it pretty much to 60 miles last week - 59.7, YAY! It was funny how 60 miles just added up without me even thinking about it...I had like a 4 mile day thrown in there somewhere but it balanced out with the 10 and 13 mile days to make a solid week of mileage! I am finally, finally starting to get sort of excited about running a marathon in October...all summer it has been like this chore to get the miles in, get workouts done, etc, but I think I'm in much better shape than I realize and I just don't have the race results to show it - yet.  Last night I went out on the Boston course for what I planned to be 7 miles...which then turned into 10, because I felt AMAZING.  Like completely unstoppable.  Heartbreak felt like a little bump in the road, that was how super my legs were feeling.  I ended up at 7:21 pace for the entire thing, which is just utterly ridiculous, and I couldn't really chalk it up to stopping a lot or anything because...well...I didn't stop much at all!  So it was pretty exciting to see my legs kind of getting into gear and to actually feel mentally into it! Long run wise so far I have a 17, 16.5, 15.1, 19, 18.6....I am amazed at how consistent I've been with just getting the miles in no matter if I want to or not.  Time for those 20s pretty soon....as the weather cools down, maybe I'll actually look forward to them! :)

Tag!

So I was tagged by Lacey to post 10 random things about myself...my first tag, hooray :)  Actually she was probably thinking "maybe if I tag her, she will actually POST!" And apologies again for my incredibly sporadic posting...PT school has me in its grip and won't let go! I am as it turns out still training for a marathon and though I had one week of pretty much complete failure 2 weeks ago (24 miles total? 10 mile long run? Er....let's not talk about that) but admittedly I had an excuse, since I had an exam at the beginning of the week, then my mom and sister were visiting for the weekend and so I spent a lot of time walking...not so much running.  But no worries, I brought it back this past week with a solid 56.5 miles, including a 19.2 mile LR. Woot woot!  The "relaxedness" I'm letting myself have in this training cycle hasn't exactly been inspiring me to hit the track for any killer workouts, but for some reason I'm still getting long runs in. I will be completely honest - I have NOT been at the top of my mental game running-wise.  For some reason, the past couple weeks especially, it's like I've had to absolutely drag myself out the door to go running, and when I do get out there I have no desire to run fast(er) than my "easy" (which is still about a minute per mile faster than it should be...in case you were worried lol). I think that's been part of my lack of desire to write anything on here too, since running itself has been so "meh" there's really been nothing worth sitting down and writing about. I'm trying to focus on the times when running has been great to me lately (like my most recent long run, which, despite being hungover and run on almost no sleep, was KICKASS in a way that only extremely hilly, tiring, and yet fantastical long runs can be) and just forcing myself to get out there...this, like all slumps, will end soon enough. :)

But anyway...the point of this post is to enlighten everyone to 10 random things about myself...sooo...here goes! I tried to make none of them running related, because I think you all know enough about my running life. :)

1. I met the BF completely randomly when he called me off the street to do a kegstand at a Badger football party and I accepted.  Instead of going home to (drunkenly) make a notecard for my physics exam, I decided to stick around and befriend him...we went on an actual date a week later and it's been over 2.5 years since. :)

2. I started dancing when I was 3 and danced competitively all throughout middle and high school, then was involved with a dance student org in college.  I miss it a lot and I choreograph dances in my head whenever I hear a song that inspires me - in college, I choreographed part of a piece while on a run.

3. I want the song Don't Stop Believin' played by a string quartet as I walk down the aisle at my wedding. (And I know such a thing can be done because one of my friends in college played in a string quartet that did exactly that)

4. I cannot stand the sound of ripping cardboard or touching my nails to porcelain (like trying to pick up a bar of soap in the tub)...just thinking about either of those things make me cringe.

5. When I was 4, I broke my wrist jumping off an upside down laundry basket.

6. I'm sort of out of the college phase of partying hard, but I am kind of a beer snob. I love craft beers, my most recent favorite variety has been imperial stouts, which everyone seems surprised by coming from a girl.

7. I absolutely LOVE dogs - worked with them for a little over 2 years, and met sooo many amazing puppies - and I can't wait until I'm in a life situation where I can have one of my own and be a good dog owner. My childhood dog was a mystery mutt (our best guess was black lab/schnauzer) named Corky and he was the best. dog. ever.

The Corkster...he deserved a pic :)

8.  I have really terrible luck when it comes to electronics, and in the past 4 years have managed to lose/have stolen/break 4 cameras, 3 phones, 1 laptop, and 2 ipods. A lot of them weren't my fault (most recently, someone dropping my camera in the ocean) but some of them most definitely were (running in the rain with my ipod...)

9. I'm named Audrey after my grandma who is pretty much the coolest lady ever.  She is 88 and still works because she loves her job, has traveled all over the world, is an amazing cook, dresses with style and class, and is the most positive person I've ever met - I really hope to be as awesome as her when I am old!

10.  My favorite flavor of ice cream is gold medal ribbon, which is a flavor from Baskin Robbins that is chocolate and vanilla ice cream with a vanilla swirl. Sounds pretty basic but you cannot even imagine how good it is. YUM!

Alright...well writing this list has been a good source of procrastination from the run that I need to to today...and then it's off to a well-deserved night out after two exams and a practical at the end of this week.  Hopefully I'll have an exciting long run this weekend with more to tell you about after that.  Happy Friday!

Week 2: LR Fail/Workout Win

A confession: I was a naughty little marathoner this week.  I skipped my long run in favor of going to Cape Cod with a bunch of PT girls. Obviously I can't make a habit of this buuuut I have to say it was pretty fantastic to blow off ALL responsibilities [school, running, cleaning the apt, the works] to spend a day sunning on the beach, reading trashy magazines, frolicking in the ocean, and drinking sangria. And since that one day was probably the only real "vacation" I'm going to have all summer I really had to go all out and not spoil it with an early, hot, 14 miles, right? The night before I was all "oh, I'm going to get up at 5am and do it!" Haha riiiight....funny funny joke.  The alarm went off and clearly THAT wasn't happening...maybe someday I can turn myself into an early morning runner, but I just haven't made it there yet.

I feel a little guilty but it's water under the bridge.  Despite skipping the LR I still got in 34.6 which isn't really marathon training mileage, but it's not horrible - had I done the run I would have hit 50, which I plan to do this week.  I did get in an AMAZING workout with GBTC on Tuesday - we did a speedy 3+ mile warmup (think 7:25 pace speedy), followed by 4000m of 300m @ 3K pace, 100@MP, 10 minutes of rest, and then another 2000 m of the same thing.  I actually had a nice little pack of a couple other girls to run with and it was FANTASTIC - we went into the workout hoping to average around 7:15 for the overall pace (including the slow 100s) and wound up with sub-7...a number which I have NEVER seen in a workout over 1 mile reps. Hilariously the first 4K was also technically a 4K PR for me (I'm sure I've run faster ones within my fastest track 5Ks, but still)...granted I haven't run one since high school CC but it still cracked me up a bit - just looking at how far I've come since then.   It was SUPER hard but running with a group was incredibly helpful, I was always motivated to chase the one girl who was just slightly faster. Then we did a relaxed 3+ mile cooldown which was the perfect way to end a 10+ mile day. That was definitely the highlight of my week, and honestly, after doing a workout like that, I feel slightly less bad about skipping the LR.

Nothing else too exciting on the running front this week - the heat has still been pretty unbearable and my schedule has forced me to do several runs in the heat of the day which has just been horrendous. I am leaving my job in a couple of weeks - I feel like it's really cutting into my study time for school and much as I'd love to have the extra money, I'm out here to be going to school, not working, and it's just entirely too much at this point - so that will free up a bunch of nights for some running after the sun goes down which is excellent news for my marathon training anyway.  I did OFFICIALLY register for Baystate on Tuesday - with only 200 spots left I didn't want to take my chances - and of course it was terrifying as always when I hit that "submit" button.  I wonder if I'll ever get to the point where registering for a marathon won't be a huge deal? Probably not.haha.

Hmmm...back to studying the shoulder and wrist complexes...fun times.  I haven't been a very good student along with being mostly a lazy runner this past week...it's time to crack down, hit the books AND the roads!  Have a great Monday!

Oh Hey!

Yes, yes it has been over a month since my last post - yikes! I've just had a LOT going on school wise and barely enough time just to run, let alone to run and blog about said running.  If I'm not posting here and you're just DYING to see what I'm up to training-wise (which all of you are of course, right? haha), I have actually been pretty diligent with posting stuff on DailyMile, it's kind of been my mini blog lately, so I'll occasionally tell a fun tale or two on there.  But hopefully I'll be back to my usual at least once a week-ish posting since school has let up somewhat and of course, because I am BACK IN TRAINING!

Oh yes indeed. This week marked my first week of actual training for Baystate 2010.  Right now, I am rocking and rolling with the "the plan is, there is no plan" plan. And hot damn, I'm liking it.  Obviously to a certain extent I know what kinds of things I want to be doing, where I want my mileage to be at, what sorts of workouts will probably be helpful, etc, and I have a friend who's following the Daniels plan so I'm copying off her workouts a little bit.  But for now anyway, I'm just going with running 6 days a week, doing a workout once or twice a week, whichever suits my fancy, 6-8 miles on the non-workout days [those 12 mile midweek runs will be here soon enough], and long runs on the weekend - duh. It's sort of odd but yet liberating not having my training planned down to the last detail - there were a lot of things I liked about knowing exactly what I had to do on a given day, but in my current life situation [read: grad school] things are going to come up and I just can't be a mindless slave to a training plan.  Plus, so far in my life, "no plan" = 3:39, "plan" = 3:46...no plan's looking pretty good to me right now. :P

Anyway, week 1 has been good.  I finally, finally got out of my 36-40 mile rut that I've been in for the past like month and a half, and got in a solid 48.2 miles, including a long run and 2 workouts.  Combine this with the fact that it got up to 100 degrees in Boston this week and I'm pretty pleased with myself.
Week 1
Mon - 3 miles easy, it was balls hot and I felt physically sick for about an hour after I returned. Lovely!
Tues - 10 x 400 @ 10K pace [7:03] w/ 200 recovery @ 8:00, 3 mile warmup, 1.6 mile cooldown - did this one on the TM/track at BU's GORGEOUS fitness center because this was the day it got up to 100, and I'm pretty sure if I'd tried to do it outside the 400 pace would have more closely resembled MP
Wed - 4.3 miles on the indoor track, tired from the workout and it was still really hot
Thurs - OFF, the BF enticed me with pizza and drinks so...yeah :P
Fri - 2 mile warmup, 3 x 1.5 miles @ tempo pace [7:30], 1.5 mile cooldown - Indoors again, the only time I had to do the workout was mid-afternoon and once again, no way I was doing that in the blazing sun.  Was kinda dragging.
Sat - 7.3 miles in the POURING rain, absolutely fantastic.  It was raining so hard I couldn't even see the other side of the reservoir, the wind was blowing the rain sideways, and when I ran home on Beacon Street there was one point that was pretty much completely flooded out - there were WAVES for goodness sake.  It was ridiculous but I've been dreaming of a rain run ever since this heat wave hit, so it was pretty glorious. :)
Sun - 17!! mile long run
Haha, so this was completely ridiculous. I was planning on doing 14 with my running buddy Kelly and another woman who is also tentatively running Baystate.  I was really whiny at the start of the run because it was hot, but my legs actually felt pretty solid and the heat wasn't bothering me as much as expected, plus we were stopping for water every 20-30 minutes so things were going pretty well.  We got on the Minuteman Trail and headed towards Arlington and at some point apparently missed the turnaround..soooo we may or may not have ended up with a 2:26/17 mile run.  Slightly insane since the longest run I've done in the past 3 months has been 12.5? Possibly. Awesome? YES! My legs were starting to go at the end, but that's pretty much to be expected, and I'm honestly not really sore today at all. Way to start off true training with a bang, right? And then of course I was studying with some friends at Panera later that night, and there was another table of people from our class nearby [we call them the "smart" people...obviously, in a doctorate program EVERYONE is smart, but they're the ones who are like always, always, ALWAYS studying, and for that reason I'm sure they're also the people getting the A's.] I mentioned to someone that I was tired because I woke up at 6:30...they asked why....uh....to run 17 miles.  The other table is like, who ran 17 miles? Yup, that would be me.  One of my friends was like "you know, that doesn't even surprise me anymore"...told you these PT kids were smart . :P

Soooo that's where I'm at right now! I'm happy to have 5 seconds to actually post on this thing, and I FINALLY caught up on my Google Reader [I had like 200 unread posts on there at one point...yeahh...ridiculous] so hopefully I will back around commenting and posting from now on. :)

MIA

Remember how I said I wouldn't be posting much because I had started PT school? I wasn't joking.  Literally every waking moment of the past week when I wasn't sleeping, eating, or running  (and sometimes during the latter two activities), I was studying....a semester-long gross anatomy class smashed into a month is no joke.  Had my first exam of grad school today and I feel like it went reasonably well...so I've been able to give myself this one, glorious, anatomy-free night before I dive right back in to origin, insertion, action, blood supply, nerve supply...ack.

I also finally made it over the 40 mile hump this week (barely haha) for the first time since Boston - 40.4 miles, woot woot!    Actually this is somewhat of an accomplishment considering that we've been experiencing jungle-like humidity in the northeast for most of the past week...80 degree weather + 90% humidity = one runner who wants to quit outdoor sports altogether.  Longest run for the week was a 10 miler with my running buddy Kelly where my legs felt like junk, but I made it through and got up close & personal with a huge snapping turtle in the middle of the trail on the out & back which was quite cool...stopping and looking at the turtle was a good excuse to stop running for 5 seconds haha. But I really shouldn't be whining since running has been my one moment in time the last week (as I'm sure it will continue to be in the future) where I can just STOP thinking about all of the information flooding my brain and just focus on myself for an hour or whatever...I'd be so much more stressed out I think if I didn't have that daily run to look forward to.

Other than that I don't have much to report...training still won't be back in full swing until July so for now I'm just working on that base and getting through gross...hopefully at some point soon I'll be able to take another deep breath and come up with some sort of coherent/interesting post, but until then....happy running!

Mayday

Well, May is over - not a terribly exciting month in my running life, but that's kind of to be expected coming down from Boston near the end of April.  Considering I've been pretty lax about number of runs per week/distance/whatever, the numbers are pretty decent for a base building month.

Total Miles: 146.5
Races: 2 [5K & 12K]
Workouts: 0! haha
Longest run distance: 10.6 miles
Weekly Mileage Range: 30.7-36.4

Kiiinda lazy indeed. But I really enjoyed hopping in a couple of random races and seeing what happened - the 5K is definitely a good distance for that.  I'm actually thinking about another one at the end of June - the Heartbreak Hill 5K - mainly because it's at BC, which is, you know, RIGHT by my apartment!  Though running up Heartbreak at 5K pace doesn't exactly sound pleasant, but whatever, we shall see.  I think my lazy time is about to come to an end though, as I'm working up a new marathon training plan that will most likely officially start in July, and I'm hoping to get my base up to a little higher place before then, and maybe start incorporating some light tempo work and hills back into my life.  As I briefly mentioned in my last post, I've also decided for realsies that I'm going to join Greater Boston Track Club!  I think it will be inspiring AND a great training stimulus to be at workouts with such fast ladies, and it sounds like there's a group that is like the "C" group that has goals more similar to mine - so that's fantastic too!  And the singlets are really awesome and I want one....there, I said it. :)

I'm getting back in the swing of the Sunday long run and yesterday I went for a lovely 10 miler down Beacon Street, around the Public Garden and Boston Common and back. It was just....pleasant is really the only word I can think of to describe it.  I sadly may have destroyed my ipod for good on a glorious run in a torrential downpour on Saturday [I was running to work, it was drizzling when I started...aaaand then 15 minutes later it was like a monsoon...I tried to wrap the ipod in a random piece I tore off a garbage bag by Jamaica Pond but alas...I think it's donezillas] and I wasn't really looking forward to doing this "long" run without it, but it turned out to be SO nice. I am working on hitting an EASY pace especially on long runs, and that was the goal on this one - if I came in under 8:00 pace I was going to be grumpy with myself.  So my goal was to run by feel, and if I was breathing hard or my legs were twinging at all, I was probably going too fast.  The result - 8:13 pace!  Pretty much ideal for LSD.  I was really pleased with that, and since I ran in the cooler temperatures after 7 pm, I was only sliiiightly dehydrated by the end.  Speaking of hot weather I had a bunch of friends from my track club in Wisconsin that raced at the Madison half marathon yesterday - it was CRAZY hot and humid and they actually ended up cancelling the full marathon at about the 4 hour mark because the conditions were getting dangerous.  So major props to them for some awesome times & races despite pretty awful conditions...I know for a fact I would crash and burn in a situation like that.

Hmm, well I might not be around this blog as much in June [not that I'm really ever around SUPER often but you know what I mean] because starting tomorrow I will be involved in what I'm pretty sure is going to be Gross Anatomy Hell Month...aka, the beginning of PT school. What should be a semester class in 1 month....exams EVERY Monday....4 1/2 hours of class every day...oh yes, this will be a blast and a half.  I shouldn't be whining because I am excited about starting PT school, truly, but talk about diving right into the deep end.  So if I start suddenly speaking only in muscle terminology...well...you'll know why. :)

Bedford 12K and 3 Things Thursday!

Sooo I raced again last weekend!  Kind of on a whim [when was the last time I signed up for a race day-of?], and despite some knee and Achilles issues that had been bothering me all week, I decided to head up to Bedford, NH with my running buddy Kelly for the Bedford Rotary Memorial 12K. Hello, checking another state off the list AND a new distance? Yes, count me in, even if the race pretty much served as a rude awakening as to the fact that as it turns out you actually DO have to run more than 30 miles a week to succeed at longer races - who would have thought? Hah. 

I was up at 5:30 and out the door in 20 minutes, headed down to Brighton Center where I was supposed to catch a 6:11 bus to Watertown Yard where I was going to meet Kelly....except that bus just decided not to come.  Neither did the one that was supposed to come at 6:20.  Major transportation FAIL!! I also saw a bus blow right by a lady standing at the bus stop on the opposite side of the street, so apparently the drivers of the 57 line were just not on their A game on Saturday morning.  I wound up successfully meeting Kelly and we drove out to Bedford.  Exciting times for me since I have never in my life been to NH!  Haha yes so it was pretty thrilling...the town was gorgeous and the high school track was a sight to behold - nicer for sure than plenty of college tracks I've seen [ahem, Ripon...haha]  Registration was a breeze, and I was OK with not getting a shirt after seeing the extra large size/hilariously awful eagle design on the front.  

I never really got nervous or entirely processed the fact that I was racing I guess.  Kelly and I went off on a 20 minute warmup and I was feeling kind of crappy, but I was really only mildly concerned.  We got back near the starting area and met up with a whole bunch of GBTC women [who are all fantastic, nice, and FAST as hell...and I think I've finally been convinced to join the club for real, yay].  The start was kind of awkward, there was really no line on the ground or cones or anything as far as I could tell - everyone was just kind of in a big blob, then the gun went off, and we were running.  There was no chip mat at the beginning either, so I had no idea when to start my watch - my guess is 5-10 seconds went by before I went over the "real" start haha.  The start was a pretty big downhill and being me, I went out way faster than was smart for my current fitness and the distance.  My first mile was 6:45 give or take and clearly, I wasn't holding on to that since I'd run a slower average pace for less than half the distance the week before.  And yet I pretty much decided to disregard the fact that I really, really wasn't in shape to go out for a PR, and that I'd run 7.5 miles or more like...TWICE in the past month and a half since Boston...nope, just gonna go for it.  So mile 2 was 7:04, but the problems were already starting.  The course was gorgeous, but the elevation profile posted on the website is also VERY deceiving.  It makes it look basically flat, with one big hill at mile 3 or 4....ummm...that's a giant lie.  Literally, the entire course was rolling hills - not huge hills or anything, but just relentless hills that beat my lazy, reservoir running legs to a pulp. 

Mile 3 was 7:23 or so [you can tell this was an on-the-fly race when I don't even have my splits written down anywhere haha] and that was pretty much the end for me.  I was totally donezillas.  Which was kind of unfortunate because 4.5 miles is a decent way to try to run fast when you kind of blew all of your energy before even the halfway point haha.  The hills were killing me and my legs were shot.  It was really nice in a way though - since this was a 100% no pressure race situation, I didn't really worry about it too much.  It wasn't FUN struggling the last half of the race, and I definitely spent a lot of time wishing it was over, but it wasn't like a feeling of "oh my God, I suck".  Mile 4 was 7:45, mile 5 7:58, yikes.  Right around the 5 mile mark a GBTC woman [confusingly, also named Kelly] came up on me and we ran together for a bit.  She passed me soon after but I tried to at least keep her in my sights - I think she ended up finishing like a minute ahead of me, and I'm confident if I was actually in shape we could have run together for sure. 

More and more hills, it pretty much seemed like the race was never going to end.  12K is kind of a weird distance - I'm probably biased because I went into it not fit for a race of that distance, but it just seemed SO much longer than a 10K. Mile 6 - 7:42....are we done yet? Mile 7 was 8:10ish [clearly I had kind of given up at this point....bad bad Audrey]...but at least now I knew that there was about half a mile to go, and about 400 meters of that were going to be run on the gorgeous, fabulous, track.  As soon as I stepped on the track I was filled with glee - literally, I have not set foot on a track since October.  That's the longest I've gone in 8 years without feeling the bounce of rubber under my running shoes. I got excited and actually managed an acceptable kick.  My finish time was 56:28 - 7:35 pace.  There were adorable little kids handing out Otter Pops at the finish - best. idea. EVER!  

So not an overly thrilling race, but a good experience nonetheless. I can't say I was super jacked about my time, but I do think that I couldn't have expected much more given that I haven't been running any distance that would put me in good shape for anything over maybe 5K since Boston.  I think a small part of me thought that since I ran a solid 5K last weekend, I could run a solid 12K this weekend...but 3.1 miles is MUCH different than 7.5 miles. I think it was a good thing though - definitely a good kick in the butt like...okay, naptime's over...time to get back to racing shape.

OK - that was probably the shortest race report you've ever read on Run Like A Llama! I think I procrastinated so long on writing it because really I didn't have too much to say about the race - I am not in shape really to be "racing" but it was a fun time and I enjoyed it as a workout anyway. :) Now onto the real 3 things of 3 things Thursday. :)

1.  The Bedford 12K was my last race as a 22 year old...this past Tuesday I turned the big 2-3!  Unfortunately I spent a lot of my birthday working, but afterward the BF and I went to the aquarium, strolled by the ocean, and grabbed appetizers and drinks in the North End.   After a somewhat ridiculous experience trying to take the bus to the restaurant we were going to go to for dinner [long story short: restaurant closed at 10, got on the bus at 8:30, somehow missed the stop/stop wasn't announced, ended up at a random orange line station nowhere near the restaurant at 9:30...] we decided to just stick to what we know best and have dinner at Publick House, followed by a couple more drinks at American Craft. [Yes, I live within walking distance of not one, but two excellent beer bars...feel free to be jealous].  Delicious food, fantastic beer, and of course the best company ever - it was a wonderful evening. :)

2.  Speaking of birthdays, it's kind of related to my next thing.  I got a fun birthday package from my mom which included not only orange Nike Tempo shorts [the best running shorts ever]....but the WHOLE Boston photo CD!  I was super surprised - I kind of wanted the photo CD since I would rather have the pictures on my computer anyway, but the prices were so crazy I would never have asked. But my mom is amazing and decided to get it for me - definitely a fantastic memento of my first Boston!  Sooo now that I have them all for my own I can share some of them with you :)

Finish Line!  I am shocked - SHOCKED - that I am actually smiling.  That smile says THANK GOD it's over

This one really makes me laugh...what the HELL am I doing with my face? It's funny because I vaguely remember being at this point in the race [somewhere on the endless expanse of Beacon Street] and MAKING this face - scrunching my mouth up and just trying to fight through the pain.  It cracks me up that it was actually captured on film.

Home stretch - note the classic head tilt/grimace look that appears when I'm literally on the verge of collapse :P

15K mark - I was already struggling by this point, and I attempted to make myself look strong/happy for the camera.  Did it work?

This picture kind of makes me laugh as well, because I spent the whole race running on the right side of the road except for like ONE mile at the end.  I think I veered over there because someone was handing out fruit punch Gatorade, which sounded way better than lemon lime at that point. I also was trying to hide because I was dying...don't ask me how moving to the other side of the road accomplishes that haha

I think this one is my favorite.  Making the turn from Hereford onto Boyleston, and I can SEE THE FINISH!

There are a bunch more pictures besides those, but those are just a few highlights.  Very fun & exciting birthday present!

3.  Remember how I haven't really been doing anything worthwhile with my life since moving to Boston? Well my time of rest & relaxation is almost over, because Monday I am starting the 3 year journey towards becoming a doctor of physical therapy!  I am kind of nerdily excited to go back to school, although I'm sure there are going to be points where I just regret the whole thing.  It's weird starting at a school that's NOT Madison too, but it's good to be stepping out of my comfort zone, and obviously I already have an advantage having lived here for the better part of this year - no getting lost in a new city for me!  Mostly I'm just really excited to be starting towards an actual career, as opposed to just a random job.  So basically...exciting times in general. :) 

Short but sweet: Mystic River Herring Run Race Report

5K* run - 21:17 [6:51/mile]
22/282 OA, 4/150 F, 1/58 AG (minus top 2 women)
*long course - see below

As we all know I've been kind of sucked into the siren song of the marathon for the majority of the past year, and have really been neglecting other races in general, but especially my good friend the 5K.  I realized recently that my last 5K race was a YEAR ago and given that my birthday is next week, I figured I had to run at least one 5K at the age of 22...and so I found the Herring Run.  I won't lie, a small part of my reason for doing this particular race (besides the fact that it was cheap and actually accessible by T - it's harder to find a race that meets those criteria than you would think) was that I looked at the results from years past and got the impression that I would actually have a chance to race for place/an AG award - which I've discovered is an incredible rarity in the Boston area.  In Wisconsin virtually every road race I ran (including my first ever 5K, where I ran a high 28 minute time) I was in the age group awards - generally second or 3rd, occasionally first. Mainly because the pool of runners in Wisconsin simply isn't as big, and the really good, younger runners that do exist there aren't running the Shamrock Shuffle, generally. Well then I moved to Boston and found the 'magic' of not only 10 year age groups (instead of 5 year) and a slew of speedy, speedy club runners, and I knew my chances of winning anything ever again were out the window for the forseeable future unless I got a whole lot faster.  So finding a race where I actually had an opportunity to compete for place versus time was definitely a draw for me.

OK well now that I've bored you all with my reasons for running the race, let's talk about the actual race shall we? So first off I'm even more thrilled with this performance than I would have been, since I've discovered in browsing the blog-o-sphere today that the consensus via time comparisons and Garmins was that the course was long - most definitely a 3.2 mile race. I'm not overly surprised since it was a VERY low key race - no chips, mile markers were pieces of paper taped to cones, start line was just 2 cones on the path, etc - but with such a low key race I worried more about the course being short since that kind of negates the goodness of a good time.  So I'm very glad to hear that the race was not only a) not short but b) long. Kind of unfortunate because take off that extra .1 and it puts me at like a 20:30, but I guess I will just have to do that on an accurate course, hmm?

Anyway I woke up race morning and was not really all gung ho about going to race.  I just sort of threw on whatever clothes I could find and wound up wearing my high school track singlet and some random spandex shorts, just another testament to the fact that I was super relaxed about this race and really wasn't thinking about racing at all.  Got on the T, got downtown, switched to the orange line, waited forever, got on the train, got off at Wellington.  It took me a bit to get my bearings but I got over to the race site without too much hassle. I picked up my number and started scoping out the competition.  Girl in the plaid shorts, keep an eye on her, ooh, that red haired chick looks fast...etc. As I said it was kind of weird actually thinking about people to beat instead of just focusing on a specific time, and that was nice - actually being able to RACE other people.  I went off to warm up for a little bit and my knee was acting kind of funny - I think I must have twisted it at work or something - but it calmed down and shortly after I headed down to the start for lack of anything better to do.

We lined up and I took stock of the women around me.  There were about 8 of us in the front 3 rows or so and I figured I wanted to be ideally in the top half of that.  The whistle blew and we were off - immediately, 6 of said women were out in front of me.  Crap! Am I running fast enough? How fast am I running? How do I run a 5K again? I literally didn't know what was going on haha.  Sooo I did the only thing I knew how to do - pick a girl, reel her in, pass her.  I closed on grey tank top girl fast, then came on to coral combo and Boston 2000 shirt running together.  Once I got past those two, I knew I was in 4th or 5th position - plaid shorts was up ahead but she was already too far away for me to make a play at passing her. So the new goal was to hold position.  I came through mile 1 in 6:28 and pretty much immediately knew I was getting a road PR today.  My biggest concern had really been that I wasn't going to remember how to run fast and go through the first mile in like 7:15.  Clearly that wasn't going to be a problem, though I knew there was no way in hell I was holding on to 6:28.  Maintain, maintain, maintain.  I felt kind of sick to my stomach, but breathing and legs were okay.  The course was basically flat, a couple little rises and one point where we had to go up and over a bridge, but nothing major.  It was really pretty, running through parks and paths near the Mystic River, lots of shade, really nice stuff.

Near the 2 mile, there was a turnaround where you could see the leaders coming around the bend.  I made the turn, passing a guy in the process, and looked back to assess the competition situation.  Coral outfit was maybe 15 seconds back, with Boston shirt about 5 back from her.  OK....they are probably in as much pain as you are....hold on, one more mile.  A guy near the turn called out "4th woman" to me - so there it was, I was exactly where I thought/wanted to be, now I just needed to stay there. Mile 2 was 6:59 [given that the race was long I'm not 100% sure if all the mile splits are exactly accurate but whatever, we'll go with it] and I was like gaaah, if you go over 7 you're not going to be happy, it's almost over.  I had forgotten the suffering that is the last mile of a 5K.  But at the same time my mind is like - hello? One mile? That's like...nothing.  There was a pack of 3 men directly in front of me and I tried to hang onto them.  I was feeling more and more like vomming on the side of the path and ohh man I wanted this to be over.  We got up onto the bridge and the slight little rise felt like a mountain, ahh, but downhill on the other side.  I passed a man going over and now I finally knew where we were, maybe 1000 to go.  I willed myself to pick it up but my legs weren't having it, okay, hold pace it is.  I couldn't hear footsteps or breathing or anything behind me, so I was pretty confident I was clear of the duo I'd been trying to stay ahead of.  We passed the "3 mile" - 6:58, woo hoo, I didn't slow down!!! Down to the finish line, trying to kick, feeling like it had better be over soon or I'm going to puke on someone. And finally...I was coming to the finish, I saw 21:10 on the clock, knew this was going to be a road PR for sure, slammed my watch, DONE!  I had 21:15 on my watch, 21:17 was the official - with no chip timing what are ya gonna do? I congratulated the 3rd place woman who was coming out of the chute on the other side, then on my way out high fived 5th place (coral) and 6th (Boston). I guess the finishing order was pretty much determined after half a mile haha.

I was incredibly thirsty, and my stomach still wasn't happy, but when I was offered chili I took it for some reason.  Seriously, these Massachusetts races win at life in terms of post-race food. This was the smallest race I've been to in awhile, and there was a full spread of fruit, granola bars, vitamin water, coffee, chili, cookies, bagels...fantastic.  The chili was actually really delicious although it seemed kind of strange to be eating it at 9:30 in the morning.  I sort of meandered around for awhile, cheering for the incoming runners, eating some stuff...it's sort of weird racing alone because you don't really have anyone to talk to while you're waiting around for things. That's fine by me when I'm being hardcore and really focusing on the race but sometimes you just need someone to chatter and be ridiculous with.  I was also RIDICULOUSLY tired...I actually considered going and taking a nap in the grass while waiting for awards buuut I didn't.  Finally it was awards time - the winning girl looked like she was in high school and ran 19 high, 2nd place was 20:08 or so, 3rd was 20:20.  Since the top 3 overall go out of the running for AG awards, I got to be AG champ! Yippee!! No medals, but something even better - a table full of gift cards to pick from! [and propane tanks and raspberry bushes...lol...seriously].  So I am excited about my $50 gift card to a pizza place in the North End, and I think the BF is too [he was like, you should win races more often! haha]

Overall, I am EXTREMELY pleased with this race.  Between taper, Boston, and recovery, I haven't done any form of speedwork in 6 weeks, and my highest mileage week in the month since Boston has been 30, so to come out and run a road PR [which would have been an even bigger PR had the course not been long] is a pretty sweet deal.  What is crazy to me is that assuming that the course WAS long, so assuming I actually ran 20:30-20:40 for the actual distance of 3.1 miles...that makes me think that if I actually did some speedwork I could ACTUALLY PR in the 5K this summer...not just a road PR, but an honest to goodness fastest time I've ever run on a track or a road or a golf course or whatever PR.  I was talking with the BF and he said "well, I guess you were wrong, I guess marathon training didn't make you slower after all".  I was thinking about it and I think that marathon training didn't make me faster, but it didn't make me slower either - so that's a gain of zero. BUT - it made me STRONGER - and that really made the difference.

So a fantastic race, gorgeous day, road PR, AG win....what more could I want? Let's just say I'm definitely going to need to race more this summer...possibly as early as next weekend [yes, I may have been talked into a 12K in New Hampshire. More details soon! :)]

Competition, discovery, joy

So I had an incredible weekend of running.  Not in the sense of "oh HELL yes I nailed that workout/race", but I had 3 runs in a row that were all like gifts given to me to remind me of how much I love running. It's easy for me to get caught up in times and races and analysis, but when it all comes down to it I wouldn't be a runner if I didn't love the sport...and sometimes that sport gives back when you least expect it.  3 days, 3 reasons to love running...

Friday - Competition
Most of my run Friday wasn't great - it was hot and I was dehydrated and my legs felt like sandbags.  I had set out on the run with the intention of purposely taking it EASY, only to find that on this particular day "easy" felt remarkably difficult.  So I slogged around the reservoir and finally, happily, made the turn onto Beacon Street towards home.  I was briefly caught at a stoplight with a girl wearing blue Asics - who I have weirdly seen on the train and out running multiple times in the last two weeks.  Well - when I heard her footsteps behind me shortly after crossing the street, something just clicked - I was not going to let this girl pass me! Probably unnecessary on an easy run, but I hadn't felt that competitive spark in so long that I just had to roll with it.  I picked up the pace just slightly and focused on running strong, and strangely enough once I started thinking to myself "I am strong and I will not let this girl pass me", I FELT strong.  The sandbag feeling evaporated and I coasted down the street with ease.  And beat the girl to my turn onto Washington. In the back of my mind I was laughing at myself - like, oookay crazy, what was the point of THAT?  But it was a gleeful sort of laughter.  Because why not? Why not beat the girl down Beacon Street or pass the guy on the reservoir who is clearly not cool with a girl being faster than him, or try to lead a set of intervals at a track workout?  I love to compete, that's why.  And while I realize that no one wins a workout, if you can't race every weekend you have to find other ways to keep that competitive spark alive. As I've said before, I don't run to not be fat or because it's good for my health [wonderful benefits, yes, but not the point] - I run to be fast, to compete, to win.  So remembering that reason in the middle of a stupid, hot, pointless run was a good thing indeed.

Saturday - Discovery
Saturday I worked a double and had planned on running to work until the clouds opened up and I decided that if I was going to spend 13 hours of my day working with dogs, I sure as hell wasn't going to do it soaking wet.  So I just had to hope that I would finish up shift #1 early enough to get in a run before shift #2 [in the world of bathing dogs, the end time is different every day - it all depends on how many, how hairy, and how cooperative. Several uncooperative huskies means you are in for a very long day.]  Thankfully my prayers were answered and at 3:30 I headed out with one goal in mind: trails.  I knew there was an "urban wild" near my work that I had run past several times but never thought to go in, mainly because during marathon training knowing exact miles and times and paces was not something I would ever be willing to give up.  But I'm not in marathon training right now and I wanted to run in the woods, damnit.  So off I went. And oh my lord...it was absolutely heaven. There were paths covered in pine needles...hills and valleys and random side trails splitting off every which way....a stream...a waterfall...a pond...in other words, it was amazing.

In Once A Runner [or maybe it's Again To Carthage] Cassidy thinks something like "doing this thing you occasionally come to a rare overlook".  I ran up this hill and came to the top of this ridge overlooking this pond - the water was perfectly still, the sky a hazy gray reflecting on the surface, a couple of ducks calmly cruising nearby - this random oasis in the middle of a forest in the middle of the city.  And I just felt so appreciative of the beauty and the fact that doing this thing I love could bring me to an incredible place like this.  And for once I couldn't care less about the time or the pace, I was just enjoying the freedom of running through the forest, scampering around rocks, flying down hills, leaping fallen trees...it was phenomenal.  I returned to work in an absolutely giddy mood as my co-workers looked at my damp, sweaty, muddy self in awe. ["Are you...serious? You just worked all morning, then went on like, a 10 mile jog, and now you're coming back to work again? How do you do that??" - direct quote from a groomer lol] And I felt like I had this wonderful secret place that only I knew about, that I had DISCOVERED!  And I had no clue how far/fast I had run and I didn't care, and it was amazing.  I always like taking the time to stop and look at interesting/pretty things I have the opportunity to see while running - sunset at the reservoir, cool buildings/houses, whatever - but in the middle of the city finding this oasis of trails! forests! nature! was pretty much a magical experience.

Sunday - Joy
And finally we reach the coup de grace of the weekend, my Sunday run.  Which was just a beautiful experience [and gosh, are you guys sick of my blathering over 3 fairly run of the mill runs yet? Lol] Anyway I wasn't really that excited about the run, I'd been kind of a bum all day, but I headed out anyway. It was pretty cool actually and windy, so in my mind basically perfect for a run.  I was headed to to my usual reservoir loop but instead kept heading straight on, out onto the Newton Hills.  Ahh, those Newton Hills.  Things look entirely different when the crowds are gone, the runners are gone, the Gatorade stations and music and signs are gone, and it's just you and the darkness and the road. And for me going back there after the disaster that was my last experience on those hills - well, it was about time I exorcised those demons.  Anyway, let's just say the magic fairy dust was back...because this run was absolute, pure, joy.  I felt like I was flying. And the whole time I was thinking to myself - yes, THIS is what it's supposed to feel like. It may not have felt this way on race day, but it can feel this way. And it will again.  I cruised up Heartbreak with nothing weighing me down, nothing holding me back, all of the memories of the pain and struggle replaced with joy.  No one saw me crest the top of the hill and throw a victory fist into the air. But it was, in its own small way, a victory.  And maybe sometimes that's the way it's meant to be - that those purest, most perfect moments of running aren't on the racecourse with fans cheering, thousands of other runners at your side.  They are the moments when it is just you, transcending a bad race, a bad day at work, all of the problems that weigh on your mind - you break free. All that's left is the pure, wonderful joy of running.

I know that in these descriptions, I tend to make running out to be so much more than is necessary - like it's some kind of amazing spiritual experience or something.  But for me, sometimes, it truly is.  Running gives me something that I find nowhere else in my life, something I can hardly explain.  And runs like these just serve as a reminder of the reasons why.  And no matter how many tough races I endure, whatever else life throws my way....if I go back to the road, I'll never forget those reasons.

And on a final non-philosophical rambling note, I'm racing a 5K this Sunday!! What do you get when you cross a hard marathon and a month of lazy recovery runs with a 5K where I might have a shot at running for some hardware [depending on who shows up this year, of course]?  Guess we'll find out soon enough...=)

Boston Analysis: What went wrong/right

OK, I know you all are probably sick to death of hearing about Boston from me. But what's the saying - that like, in a relationship that breaks up it takes a week for every year you were together to get over it? Or something to that effect? Well I think it's the same thing in running.  A 5K is like that stupid fling you had where it clearly was just for fun and you can find another guy the next week. [uh..not that I've ever been in that situation haha]. You can race it every week if you want, and while it definitely takes a certain type of effort to train for a a good 5K, chances are if you're in good base shape to start and tack on a few weeks of speed and sharpening, you'll be ready to go.  A marathon is different.  A marathon is like a long, tumultuous relationship that has its ups and downs but the people in it are truly in love...and then when it ends, they're left picking up the pieces for a good long while afterward. You invest a lot more in every aspect of the training and the race, just the straight up time-commitment to running is longer, and you can't just race a marathon every weekend. [unless you are one of those people who does/can...I am not]

So anyway, I am still kind of trying to wrap my mind around the race. This isn't a post to whine about my time or how bad the race was - it is what it is and I know that under the circumstances I did damn well and I'm too far out to still be wallowing in my sorrows about a race that didn't live up to my expectations.  No, this is more of an analysis trying to figure out WHY the circumstances were...well...the circumstances. Obviously all you can really do with training and racing is try different things and just see what happens.  So here are my thoughts on what I did wrong and what I did right.

Thing I Did Right: Training Plan [in general]
I really don't think my training was the problem here. I know I was in the best shape of my life going into Boston as evidenced by my huge HM PR just 4 weeks out from the race. I thought the Hudson program was a great mix of things - his philosophy is to keep up ALL aspects of fitness throughout all aspects of training, so there's always plenty of different workouts to keep things interesting. I pretty much followed his level 2 marathon program to a T this past time, his philosophy is actually that at some point you are kind of able to coach yourself so I am thinking I might tweak things a little more this time around - but I do like the general makeup of his program.

Thing I Did Wrong: Race Pace Training
When I look back at my log, I see almost zero runs done at between 7:55-8:05 pace.  That right there is/was my GMP.  I think in my mind I figured that if I was running FASTER than that all the time, then that should be easy, right? But I think knowing how to run a pace requires a certain amount of time spent running AT that pace, and I think more GMP work will definitely be key in my future training...which leads me to...

Thing I Did Wrong: Run Too Fast, All The Time
Someone needs to pound it through my head that my easy days need to be EASY. Seriously.  There are zero reasons for running marathon/GMP or faster on a long run [unless there's specifically a segment that's supposed to be done at that pace for the sake of a workout].  This especially applies to long runs; I think my super fast 23 miler 3 weeks before the race might have completely done me in. I am a speedster at heart and it's hard for me to see slow paces...but there is a time and a place for everything, and I am not absorbing my hard training as well as I could be when I'm running too hard on my easy/recovery runs.

Thing That I Kind of Did Wrong: Stomach Issues
I followed the exact same plan for nutrition during the race as Baystate - or so I thought.  But there were 2 key differences that I think may have messed up my stomach.  One was the caffienated Gu Chomps I ate before the race.  This sounds like such a small, stupid thing, but I was not planning on having any caffeine until my Gu at mile 6.  Combined with the nerves, I think that really started my stomach off on the wrong foot.  Another issue was hydration - I think that I did a relatively good job of staying hydrated, but it actually became a problem because my stomach just couldn't handle the fluids.  This really is partially my fault because I didn't TRAIN with fuel - I had one Gu and some water on each of my 22-23 mile runs...I think maybe some fruit snacks on my 20 miler...bottom line, need to get my stomach used to what I'm going to be taking in during the race.

Thing That I Have No Idea How To Fix: Peaking Too Early
I said this in my last post, but I think it's pretty much beyond doubt that I peaked somewhere in late March/early April. I was flying through workouts and long runs and ran a great race...and then something was different.  I will confess that even in the early stages of taper my legs didn't feel right. Not really sure how to fix this one.

Thing I Might Change: Taper
I think the last week of my taper was a little too drastic.  I did it because it was the same thing I did before Baystate, but what worked for me when I was running a lot fewer miles and nearly killed myself to hit 60 is not the same as what works when I was consistently running high 50s-low 60s for like 8-10 weeks straight. I still feel like a relatively drastic taper is my style, but maybe 3-4 milers instead of 1-2 next time around.

Thing I Did Wrong: Psyching Myself Out
I have an issue with choking. There's a quote: "Big races which are anticipated almost to the point of dread are where great things can be accomplished".  Well, for me, big races which have been anticipated almost to the point of dread are where I will inevitably crash and burn, fall apart, or just fail. At Baystate I was so proud of myself for actually running the race I wanted, when I wanted - and you know why? I had zero expectations for that race - it's your first marathon, finish.  Finish under 4 hours, ideally. I think I started thinking about a BQ around mile 14. It was always there in the back of my mind but I never really made it a big deal.  Same thing with the New Bedford Half - I kind of vaguely knew I wanted to break 1:40 but it was just a tune up race, and hey, I like racing, why not?  And look what happens -a  4 minute PR.  And then we have Boston. And we have my training going amazingly, and suddenly I'm looking at wanting to run 3:30.  And as soon as it became clear that that wasn't happening [early, EARLY in the race] - I completely fell apart mentally.  I won't deny that there are so many mental games that go on with the marathon and I just absolutely didn't have it.  If I had said "hey, it's Boston, just enjoy it" or even "hey, just shoot for a PR, sub-3:39"...I would have gone out less ridiculously, and likely could have ended up with a better time.  I did everything that everyone says NOT to do in this race because I was so stubbornly set on this time goal. The mental game is definitely something I need to work on especially in the longer distances, and I definitely thing it came back to bite me in the ass at Boston.  Yes, I want to set high but realistic goals for myself, but completely screwing myself up mentally over them is really not going to help me have the race of my dreams.

Alright...so there are my thoughts. In all seriousness, I had a good experience at Boston.  I'm thankful that there were moments in the race - the thrill of walking to the start like, random drunk men dressed up as women, the giant window at 7.8 with the sign that said "check your form", high fiving little kids, Wellesley, the spectacular spectators who always seemed to have a cup of non-lemonlime Gatorade or a FREEZY POP when I needed it most, making that turn onto Boylston - where I was able to think how amazing that it was that this was The Boston Marathon.  I think I just regret that my first experience there was not the magical one that I was hoping for [apparently, the 26,000 other people did steal my "magical fairy dust" that I experienced so many times out on the course alone] and that I wasn't able to simply ENJOY the experience as much as I wanted.  I was so worried about racing, then so in pain, and so frustrated about having 'failed', that I was caught up in my own mind and body to get everything out of it that I wanted.  You know what's lucky though? I live half a mile off the marathon course.  I run on at least part of it almost every single day.  And next year and the year after, somehow or another, I will hopefully make that trek from Hopkinton to Boston once again - learning from all of the mistakes of my first time and running the race I know I can.


This is my last word on Boston 2010.  As you might be able to tell I've been sitting on this post for awhile, I just haven't had the words. It's been long enough since the 'breakup' that I can look back and smile at the good times - the 23 mile run in a pouring, wind whipping rainstorm, the mile repeats at faster than I thought possible, the best half marathon race of my life, and so many incredible runs in between - and forget about the bad.  It's time to get back out there and start anew - remembering what's brought me to this point and believing - don't stop believin' :) -  that I can only go further from here.

April Recap and What's Next?

It feels like it's been a really long time since I've posted, and I guess it kind of has - truthfully I haven't had much to say.  I have been running a decent amount since Boston, but nothing really exciting - a whole bunch of 4.5-6 mile runs with one 7.5 miler yesterday, as I decided I needed to get back into the pattern of a Sunday "long" run. But I figured doing an April training recap was as good of a reason as any to post!

April's mileage was way down from March & February, mostly due to the fact that it pretty much went through the cycle of taper...race...recover...start slow.  Still, I wound up with 156.5 miles, which I'd say is fairly respectable.  The stats:
April 2010
Total miles: 156.5
Days off: 7
Races: 1
Workouts: 3

I've already been trying to peruse my training to figure out what things I want to change when I start my next marathon training cycle which will begin in July...remember when I said that Boston was going to be my last marathon for awhile? That was a huge lie.  I think it's because the marathon is now my vendetta race, the one I KNOW I'm capable of more in and just haven't been able to show it yet.  The 5K? Sad as it sounds, I got my sub-20 and that was really all I ever could have asked for.  I will happily race 5Ks until the end of time, but something tells me that without a track season, actually training specifically for them isn't going to be a big priority for me.  The 10K in my opinion is just a means to an end to other races...again, it's a fun distance, but not something I could see myself being devoted to training for one peak race. Half marathons get a little trickier, since technically a half COULD in and of itself be a peak race [to be honest, I think I very well might have left my Boston race out on the New Bedford half course].  And now that I've run a solid half that I was actually trained for, I like the distance, I really do.  But I think the fact that I ran such a huge PR in the distance on my way somewhere else would make me less excited if the half itself was the end point.  When it all comes down to it, at the moment, the marathon is the only distance where I'm actually dissatisfied with my PR.  I think my 5K/10K/HM PRs are pretty reflective of my current status as a runner - of course I still want to improve them, but I'm thrilled with what they are even now.  The marathon though...I know I have more to give.  And my mileage-whore personality I don't think will be satisfied with anything less than the high mileage fun times that marathon training requires.

I learned a LOT from training for Boston and from actually following a plan - even though the end race wasn't what I wanted, I really can't say that there's much I'd change about my training. My fitness was high, my workouts were all fantastic.   I do believe that I peaked too early [anyone remember me RAVING about my 23 mile long run in the rain, and then the kickass half marathon race the weekend after? Yeah, I think that might have been my peak...] I'm not really sure what the remedy for that is.  I have been re-reading Hudson's book and he says the main reason for an early peak is too much race-pace running for too long - that that kind of running should really be limited to the 4 weeks of sharpening before the race.  That doesn't seem to be the culprit in my case though, since really my race pace workouts were limited to that time frame. Maybe I needed a less drastic taper...who knows. Running, especially marathon running, is one big grand experiment.

Anyway, the next couple months are going to be pretty much a maintenance phase.  No workouts, just base mileage hopefully staying in the high 30s-40s, and working my long run up to at least 12-13 miles or so. I am actually planning on jumping in a 5K in the next couple of weeks just for fun and because it's been forever since I've raced a 5K.  My current plan is the Mystic River Herring Run - celebrate the return of the herring! Haha.  It's funny, 2 weeks doesn't really seem like a long time post race, but it feels like it's been FOREVER. Like I hardly feel like Boston ever even happened.  So I am a little gung ho now to get out and go have a race that isn't a death march...I think a 5K is a good place to make that happen. :)

Yeah...this is a pretty boring post haha. Seriously, I am just not as interesting when I'm not in training. We did have an exciting water main burst here in Boston that has left the entire city without clean drinking water...actually, the stuff running through our pipes now is partially coming out of my favorite Chestnut Hill Reservoir, which might be a gorgeous place to run, but with all the fish, birds, and muskrats that hang out in there...probably not so awesome to drink.  Yesterday I did an easy 7.5 miles - longest run since the marathon - around the reservoir and it was weird seeing the spots where the water was bubbling and getting sucked out. Apparently things are supposed to be back to normal within 48 hours...I sure hope so!

3 Things Thursday: Recovery Edition

Yes...I realize its Friday...but I worked a 13 hour shift yesterday [my post-marathon legs LOVED that, let me tell you] and didn't have time to post...so...ta da, 3 things Thurs/Friday!

1 - The legs!  Physically, the day after the race I literally couldn't do ANYTHING - oh my god. My boyfriend was laughing at me and singing "domo arigato mr roboto" every time I attempted to get up off the couch [which was rare haha]. Ironically, my hamstrings which gave me so much trouble during the race weren't really that sore, but my quads? Let's just say I was feeling those downhills - ow ow ow!  The outside of my left foot was also really sore, and I think I realized why after looking at my race pictures - apparently I land REALLY far to the outside of my left foot!  There's one picture where it seriously looks like I'm going to roll my ankle when I land, my foot is so far sideways.  I remember having the same pain after New Bedford but I've never felt it in workouts...wonder if it's just a race thing?  Speaking of the pictures, I really want to order the CD so I can post them up here, because they are pretty ridiculous, and definitely tell the story of my race well.  But we'll see if I feel like shelling out the $85 for that haha.  Wednesday I went for a swim because I was having post-race mopey syndrome and needed to workout in some form to get over it, but my quads definitely weren't ready to run.  Felt good to swim again and since I'm tossing around the possibility of an Olympic triathlon this summer, was glad to see that I still feel strong in the water.  Today finally I am MUCH improved - definitely still some lingering stiffness and achiness, but nothing too severe.  I am thinking about a 2 mile shakeout later just to kind of get things moving again, but we shall see!

2 - The schwag.  I got my Boston Celebration jacket yesterday, along with a new pair of Asics armwarmers, which I sadly had to toss somewhere in Framingham during the race. RIP, Asics #1s.  Luckily, they were only $8, and with the jacket being on sale after the race, I felt a little less guilty about my purchases :).  Umm yeah...I don't think I'm ever going to take this jacket off again. EVER.  I think I said at some point that I thought the celebration jacket was a little too over the top, but I lied.  The further out I get from the actual pain of the race the more I want to SHOUT to the mountaintops that I ran Boston. Sooo the jacket is fantastic.

3 - The mind. As you all mayyy or may not have been able to tell, I was feeling a little disappointed about my race on Monday.  That feeling is dissolving faster and faster as the days go by.  The more I think about it, the more I am completely amazed with how fast I DID finish given the circumstances! It would have been easy to just dial it in and walk/jog to the finish - but I am a racer, and I raced that race to the end - if 3:46 was the best I had on that day, well at least I know that's ALL I had. So I am much more okay with my race now.  I also have a lot more respect for that tricky bitch of a Boston course - I've heard it's almost impossible to run it right the first time and whoooo boy do I know now that's true.  I certainly made some tactical errors on my part - ahem, going out too fast EVEN THOUGH I'd been warned time and time again that that was a bad idea.  But what are you going to do?  I learned from it, and that's just one more marathon under my belt to take into the next one.  I am immensely proud of my training and of my race and nothing can change that.

As you can see, recovery is going pretty well...much as I am enjoying a little time off though, I'm raring to get back on the roads!  Hope it stays cooler a little longer so I can keep rocking my Boston jacket. :)

Also....a final random side story.  So I was on the train last night absentmindedly paging through one of the magazines that came in the Boston race packet - it was clearly an international magazine because it had ads for all these races all over the world - Europe, the Middle East, Australia...whatever.  It was kind of amusing browsing the ads and all of a sudden I stumbled across an ad for...THE HANS CHRISTIAN ANDERSEN MARATHON...obviously in his hometown [where he lived in a little yellow house] of Odense, Denmark [which is on the island of Funen].  How do I know these random HCA facts? Well, my sophomore year of college I needed a literature credit.  Since I was already taking a full load of pre-med insanity, I tried to find an easy one.  The result? Literature In Translation 275 - The Tales Of Hans Christian Andersen.  The class was made even better by the fact that I took it with 7 of my friends, and that our professor was a complete nut who spoke in a faux-Danish accent and spent the first 2 weeks of class telling us about the glory that was Hans's life [we saw a map of Denmark + picture of the little yellow house about 300 times over that period]. Oh, and one of my friends joined the class a month late and still managed 100% on the first exam. It was hilarious and probably the most memorable class of my college career...so needless to say I am pretty sure the Hans Christian Andersen Marathon has just been added to my running "to-do" list of life. :)

A Day That Will Live In Infamy: Boston Marathon 2010

First off, I just have to thank everyone for the AMAZING support and comments.  The online running community is so. freaking. cool! It really means a lot to have a whole bunch of people picking you back up when a race knocks you down, so thank you all again.

So I'm feeling a little mopey today.  I honestly think I would be a little sad even if I had run a good time/PR - I mean, 4 months of training and it's OVER. Of course, it doesn't hurt that my mind is just one big loop of "what could have gone wrong, what happened?" Obviously, it just wasn't my day out there. Running is always, to some extent, a crapshoot.  You can train and train, have the most perfect training you can imagine, but if you wake up on race day and for some reason or another your legs just aren't in it, there's nothing you can do about it. It happens to the elites - and they drop out. Well for me that isn't ever an option (much as I would have liked it to be at several points during the race haha)  Unfortunately, the experience of "having a bad day" is completely exacerbated in a marathon because...well....it's LONG...and if you are feeling bad early, it's going to be a long, slow death march to the finish. But that's also what makes the marathon so special.  Sometimes its just going to suck, but you get through it, you learn from it, and if you're crazy like me, you start thinking about the next one within hours after finishing haha.

So on to the nitty gritty details. Nothing that happened race morning indicated that I was going to have anything other than a good day.  My legs felt solid, I had slept reasonably well, and all I had to do was walk out the door and hop on the T - fabulous!  I had my usual banana & peanut butter toast, and grabbed another banana and some Gu Chomps for later. I got to Boston Common around 6:15, and immediately encountered the insanity that was 26,000 runners trying to get on buses. Somehow I found my way to a short-ish line and started talking with a girl around my age named Kristen, who would become my athlete's village buddy. The bus ride was like...infinity.  By infinity I mean an hour, but sitting on the bus thinking about how you have to RUN the whole damn way back? Umm...yeah.

The athletes village was pretty cool.  It was weird having to just kind of chill out for so long before the start, but people watching was pretty entertaining [people who brought inflatable pool toys to lay on = genius!] and there was plenty of free Gatorade and Powerbars to go around. I waited in an INSANELY long/slow moving porta potty line and ended up being extremely glad that I brought my own toilet paper haha...if cross country meets have taught me anything, it's that there's NEVER enough toilet paper when you need it!  Time flew pretty fast and soon enough it was time for the second wave to leave the village.  It was actually kind of chilly at that point, so I reluctantly dropped my gear bag at the bus and we began the walk to the start.

The atmosphere walking the .7 mile to the start line was absolutely electric.  Looking back, that was probably one of my favorite parts of the whole day.  Just an endless sea of runners, everyone bouncing with the nervous energy of standing at the start line of a marathon....gloves and sweatshirts flying to the side of the road everywhere, already people out on their lawns wishing good luck...it was really cool.  I made my way to the 16000s corral and soon enough - "5 minutes to the start!" Holy crap. I was quite calm, and a little scared - probably my first indication of things to come, since fear isn't really a great emotion to have on the starting line.   I figured I would be fine once I started running, and soon enough...we were walking, then shuffling, then crossing the fabled start line...26.2 miles of hell had just begun.

The first mile was a pain in the ass. There were just SO MANY PEOPLE and it was just impossible to find any sort of groove.  I kept having to weave around or getting stuck behind groups and it was just annoying having to expend that much energy to find my place in the pack.  I went through the first mile in 8:04 and I figured - ok, that's about right - but it hadn't felt as easy as it should have.  I chalked it up to dealing with the crowds and continued on.

Whoever says that the first half of the course is all downhill is a liar, liar, pants on fire.  There are PLENTY of little rollers to keep you on your toes.  My next 2 miles were 7:43 and 7:51, and go ahead and say it - yes, I probably went out too fast. Hindsight IS 20-20 after all.  At this point though, I was still feeling OK - not fantastic, and like I probably should relax and slow down, but no major issues with the pace yet.  I was still smiling, high fiving kids, and enjoying the shout-outs I got to the "Don't Stop Believin" on the back of my shirt.    I also noticed I was hearing a lot of "Go Wisconsin!" cheers coming from up ahead somewhere....I looked up and saw a Wisconsin team singlet bobbing a few meters in front of me!  I pulled up alongside the girl and we actually had a brief conversation - turns out, she used to run for the team but now does marathons instead, and she actually knows one of my friends from the track club - such a small world of runners!  I pulled ahead, but don't worry, I would see her again before the race was over...mile 4 with that conversation was 7:49.  Again, go ahead and yell.  I think honestly my thought process at this point was one of knowing that things probably were going to go bad pretty shortly, and that if I could hang with this pace now, I might as well buy myself some time for the horrors to come.

Miles 5 and 6 I remember I thought I slowed down, but really they were 8:04 and 8:06.  I was already not feeling great and pretty much knew that 3:30 was out of the question, but I thought holding 8:05-8:10 pace was a solid goal now. I was still having some fun at this point - the crowds were just out of this world, and the whole thing was honestly kind of surreal.  I wasn't feeling bad really, but something was just off - no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't find that pace where you can just lock in, settle down, and let it ride until the later stages of the race.  I couldn't relax and find a groove - and that had me worried. I took a Gu at the 10K which gave me a little bit of a boost, then grabbed some water which I somehow managed to shoot up my nose...that was special haha.  Mile 7 was an 8:05, and that was the last reasonable split I was going to see for the day.  I noticed that my hamstrings were starting to seize up a bit and overall I just was having dead legs - NOT a good feeling to experience 8 miles into a 26.2 mile race.  I tried to slow up the pace a little bit to see if it helped - miles 8 and 9 were 8:16 and 8:13.  Alas, no relief.  The hamstring cramps were only getting worse and just in general - nothing was feeling right.  I had hoped at the start that maybe I just needed awhile to get into the groove, but there was no groove to be found. Suddenly it was looking like it was going to be a very, very long day.

So then, without even trying, I slowed down alarmingly.  When I saw an 8:28 for mile 10 I was not pleased, and the 8:34 that followed had me pretty much freaking out.  It was way, way, WAY too early for me to feel this way! Like, I had to paste on a game face going under the camera at I think the 15K mark...that's bad news bears right there.  I should have been feeling smooth and easy at that point...and the reality was not even close.  So...things were not good, and I was worried.  Then I had 2 miles in Wellesley where I thought for a minute that maybe it was going to come back.  8:10 and 8:09, the cramps mysteriously dissolved, and I was able to ENJOY the miles at Wellesley College..which was a wonderful thing.  My favorite moment of the race for sure.  I grinned the whole time, high fived everyone, laughed at the signs (I won't tell your wife! hah), and actually felt hopeful for the first time in awhile.  Maybe it had just taken me this long to loosen up - maybe things were going to be okay after all...

Orrrr maybe they were not. I came through the half in 1:46 and that was all well and good - I thought to myself hey, even if you slow down a bit from here, you'll still be solid, and yay, now you're on the course that you've run before! Familiar territory, yay!  Mile 14 was 8:13, which I was fine with...and then the wheels really fell off.  All of a sudden, the hamstring cramps were back with a VENGEANCE.  I mean honestly I can't even describe the feeling.  I was immediately struck with just complete terror - the terrain in Wellesley is still pretty forgiving so feeling like this with the big hills still to come? Noooooot good. Around this time, the Wisconsin girl came back up on me and passed me, looking just peachy keen. Damn. Mile 15 I walked through a water stop because I was starting to feel dehydrated and I knew that would only add to my issues if I didn't get some fluids in me - 8:43 for that mile.  Mile 16 was the HUGE downhill which I enjoyed primarily because it took some of the agony off my hamstrings and so I was actually able to maintain a normal pace for awhile - 8:24, and actually feeling OK again at that point.  The crowds were still amazing and I was trying to take the time to enjoy the signs (After 800 miles of training, what's 26.2 more?) and high five some kids, anything to give myself a boost.  But the cramps would. not. stop. I had to walk again through another water stop and so saw my first 9+ mile of the day at 9:15 for mile 17.  And then we came up on the hills...and my stomach absolutely decided to reject everything I had done all morning.  I have NEVER in my life had to stop and use a porta potty during a race, but honestly at this point it was either that or become one of those people with poop running down their legs that you cringe at when you see pictures of them on the internet. [TMI, I know] The fact that I ran a 9:37 with a restroom stop AND the first of the big Newton Hills astounds me - but wow, that was frustrating.

From that point on, it was pretty much a struggle to survive.  My legs were gone beyond the point of repair, my hamstrings scrunched into tiny, death-like balls of pain.  I honestly hardly even remember the Newton Hills.  I was in such an abyss of pain that it was like I was surrounded with a haze, the stabbing in my hamstrings overriding every other stimulus. The irony is that I remember feeling like the hills wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been for the cramps.  Mile 19 was 8:52 - I bore down a little bit and made myself get through it, but unfortunately that was the last sub-9 mile I would see.  I walked through a water stop right before Heartbreak since again, I was feeling dehydration coming back on top of all of my other problems.  Started running again and was INSTANTLY hit with the most debilitating side cramp I have ever experienced.  Oh my God.  I tried squeezing it, I tried stretching it, I tried to run through it, there was just no way.  I am pretty sure I may have shouted a couple obscenities as it pulled me up to a walk.  This was NOT how this was supposed to be happening!  Why was everything going so. incredibly. wrong?

The cramp subsided a bit but thanks to the extensive walk break it caused mile 20 was an abysmal 9:56.  I had pretty much resigned myself to a run as much as possible/walk when you have to situation at this point and honestly I think I wound up with a better time this way than I would have if I had just tried to continue running.  The pain in my hamstrings was so intense, I can't remember feeling anything vaguely close to that in my life.  From what I can remember outside my bubble of suffering, Boston College was AWESOME.  Loud, drunk college kids make quite a fantastic cheering section, and since it was a downhill I was actually capable of running for awhile, so I tried to soak it in.  I remember one surreal moment when the green line train slowed down so the people on it could watch the runners, so even at my pathetic speed I was beating the train. Mile 21 was a 9:48, walked through a water stop.  God, 5 miles to go.  Every step was a struggle as I made the turn into Cleveland Circle.  The crowds were crazy and it was incredible, and I only wished that I could actually ENJOY this moment instead of being stuck in this God-awful state I was in.  I saw the BF with my amazing dinosaur sign, amazingly I was actually running as I went past him, and the only gesture I could think of to sum up my current state was slapping my hand across my face haha.  I think in sign language that loosely translates to "DISASTER!"  Mile 22 was a 9:30, 23 a 9:39.  I seriously can't believe that my splits were even staying that reasonable considering I actually stopped at the side of the road to stretch out my hamstrings at mile 23, and there was plenty of walking going on during those miles - my effing hamstrings were just spasming and now everything else was starting to go to, in the standard breakdown that is mile 23 of a marathon.

But now there were 3 miles to go, and the crowds were getting more intense, and I was going to be damned if I wasn't going to run as much as was physically possible for this last stretch of the race.  And I tried to just soak it in and find something, anything, to cherish and savor and keep me going.  Then I saw someone handing out icy pops.  THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER TASTED! My body had long since given up on accepting "running" food, Gatorade was making me nauseous and the last Gu I took tasted like sticky death. So this magical, cold, sugary pop was like salvation.  Run, run, run, walk.  Just keep moving forward.  Then suddenly I saw a Wisconsin singlet up ahead.  Seeing this girl again not only brought out the competitor in me, at long last, but it also made me realize - I am not the only one in this situation.  I came up on her and said hi and that I was dying - she responded that she was pretty much the same.  I passed her and that became my carrot on the string for the rest of the race -just stay ahead of Wisconsin girl.

Mile 24 was 9:16, I was forcing myself to run more because come on, come ON, we are almost there. Beacon Street just seemed like it was never going to end.  I was caught in this bizarre spiral where when I would walk, a lot of people would pass me...but I would start running and pass them back.  I knew a PR was gone, that even re-qualifying was gone...all I could do was salvage the end of this race the best I could and try my best to enjoy the moment.  2 miles to go.  The bridge over the highway nearly brought me to tears.  I just had nothing left, anywhere.  Somehow, despite walking up that hill, I found a 9:01 for mile 25.  One. God-forsaken. mile. to go.  And I was not going to walk.  I just would not.  It was the most painful mile I have EVER experienced.  My face was twisted into a grimace, my hamstrings absolutely felt like they were being stabbed with steak knives, and the rest of my legs weren't far behind.  But goddamnit, I was going to run that final stretch.  And I did.  People around me were pumping up the crowds, all I could do was bear down and focus and hope that my legs just didn't suddenly stop under me.  The last stretch down Boylston seemed infinitely long, the finish line like a mirage on the horizon that didn't seem to be getting closer.  But I ran, I ran, I ran, and finally, with an attempt at a smile that I'm sure more closely resembles a grimace and a fist haphazardly thrown in the air, I crossed the finish line. 3:46:48. Done.

And then everything that wasn't already cramped up did.  My lower back.  My stomach.  My calves. My hip flexors.  Everything - spazzing out, complete disaster. In a weird moment of running serendipity, I looked over and saw a guy in brown Vibrams with Luau on his jersey...it was Matt from DailyMile!  Somehow, despite the fact that he started 11 corrals back from me and the odds of it are ridiculously low, we ended up crossing the finish line at the same time - crazy!  I attempted to talk but eventually just wandered away I think haha.  The chute was just neverending.  Much as I really wanted my space blanket and my medal and my lunchbox of goodies and my Gatorade, mostly I just wanted - NEEDED - to sit down, or do anything to relieve the nuclear war currently being raged in my hamstrings. Eventually I reached the end - got my bag - and started slowly hobbling to the train station. I knew I should eat something, but I also felt like I was going to puke at any given moment - fantastic stuff I know.

After splatting onto my bed for awhile when I got home, I realized I was hungry.  It was weird eating dinner and drinking beer down on Beacon Street where just hours before thousands of people had been running.  The aid stations were gone, the porta potties were being trucked out, a few drunken stragglers playing beer pong were all that was left of the marathon crowds.  And really, it was a little sad.  That letdown after something really big has happened - it's always kind of hard.  A good race tempers it a little bit but it's always still there, somehow.

So that was my Boston Marathon.  I'll probably do some analysis on here in the days to come but this is getting long and Lost is on soon. :) I think, given the circumstances, I have no idea how I even finished in the time I did.  With how bad I felt for such a large percentage of the race, and how much walking I did, the fact that I never cracked 10 minute miles absolutely amazes me.  I can't chalk the race up as a total loss because of that.  But it is hard - mostly frustrating - to KNOW that I was in shape to run 3:30-3:35 based on my training and tune up races...and have this be the result.  There's a quote that "the marathon will humble you" and it's true, especially when you're talking the Boston course.  You never know what will happen on any given day and as I said that's part of what gives the marathon it's mystique.  I am a little bummed that I didn't manage to requalify for next year...yeah...remember when I said this would be my last marathon for awhile? Somehow, despite the fact that that was the most painful experience I've ever put myself through, I have pretty much already decided to train for Baystate again in the fall, ideally to requalify to run Boston again in the spring.  Yes....the marathon has seduced me with its wiles...and looking back on the race achieving the time I did under the circumstances makes me wonder....damn, what could I have done on a GOOD day?  But this is the truth: there will be good days, and there will be bad days.  Yesterday definitely fell under the bad category.  But no one can take my incredible training, the two PRs I gained on the way, or the fact that I'm a Boston Marathon finisher away from me.  And I have no doubt in my mind that I'll be back for more.